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PHIL:

I’m here

TINY:

Yeah, well, you don’t count

PHIL:

It’s not all about ro ears):

I CAN’T HEAR YOU

Ex-boyfriend 9 coe DEVON CHANG Oh, eek to god, and became The Boy Who Launched a Thousand Texts

Tiny is distracted from Phil as he and Devon make eye contact There is soe

TINY (TO PHIL):

I’ll be right back

Tiny runs after Ex-boyfriend 9, leaving Phil alone onstage (Don’t judge Real friends understand)

ACT II, SCENE 7

PHIL

(looking offstage, then turning to the audience):

We can only wish them the best Let’s see hoent

At this point, DJANE comes out (In a former incarnation of this musical, she was Janey, but I think Djane fits her personality better) I hope Phil and Djane don’t e directions, but Djane is the girl that Phil Wrayson should really be going out with It would have happened long ago, if they didn’t keep getting in its way

Djane shakes her head

PHIL:

No luck?

DJANE:

All of the clovers had three leaves

PHIL (thinks for a second):

Oh, I see what you did there

DJANE:

All he found at the end of the rainboas a pot of--

PHIL:

Stop! This is a family show

DJANE (deadpan):

In ay is this a family show?

Phil just looks at her

DJANE:

What?

PHIL:

It’s just thatI don’t knowyou look nice?

Djane gazes at hiely

DJANE:

Noould you do that?

PHIL:

Because you look nice-ish?

DJANE:

Oh, now it’s nice-ish

PHIL: