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"I’m sorry, Justin, I can’t I’m in love with Jack" My words were brutally honest and I hadn’t thought about what to say -- the words just fell out of ed froer "You’re a fking tease, Sydney"

"What?" I was surprised at his words, but even more shocked at the venom that spilled from his tone I was halfway to drunk, but I knew Justin was barely buzzed so it definitely wasn’t the alcohol talking

"You sit there and flirt with ht like you’re innocent and then when I react, you tell "

His words hit me like a slap in the face I didn’t really care if he calledI could sit there and listen to I was just about to speak when Justin stood, looking down at me as he spoke

"I knew he looked familiar but I couldn’t place his face until I saw the news a feeeks ago He lookeddo you think it will last before he goes back to a pro, Syd?"

And with those parting hurtful words that roiled in my sto on the couch with h I was growing tired of being on a bus and tired of avoiding Justin The day after Justin kissedthe air between us ere sober and trying to move forward But Justin didn’t have tiht from there on, sometimes more than one at a tirateful that their bus had been fixed quickly or I would have had to have disinfected the bus on a daily basis, sometimes more than once a day

For his part, Justin seemed to steer clear of me too, which was more than fine with me I didn’t know if Justin had told Kyle about what had happened, but I could tell the way that he looked between the two of us on occasion that he knew so had occurred I had confided in Sienna the next day, and then thrown around the idea of being honest with Jack about what had happened But after a day of thinking it over I decided it was probably best to keep it tohad really happened in the end anyway And telling Jack would onlyeach night ere apart It was definitely a conversation that needed to be had in person, rather than on the phone separated by thousands of ht I was back in New York for o home to Jack’s instead of where I had lived when I’d left for the tour I wondered if it would feel weird to walk in and out without knocking and if it would ever feel like my old apartone, Jack had h I had technically lived with him for a few uest before I left

Even though my break was only four days, we spent the whole first day and night in bed together We ordered in for food, but other than that we didn’t see another soul for 24 hours We didn’t even turn on the television It was just me and Jack, and it warmed my heart to feel that he didn’t want to share me as much as I didn’t want to share hiht of the AVN Awards I was nervous about the night and had no idea what to expect Jack toldwith a red carpet and ending with various parties thrown by the industry The only difference, according to Jack, was that the perfor awards were adult fil that I had never been to either a mainstream celebrity award show or an adult entertainot ready

I looked in thethe bathrooood, but it didn’t help to cal in a room filled with beautiful people with perfect bodies Jack stepped into the bedroo room at the same moment I entered the bedroom from the master bathroom What I saw took my breath away

Jack’s normally disheveled -- but in a completely sexy way -- hair, was slicked back in a look that conjured up a celebrity froo He looked like he had just stepped out of a Cary Grant movie in his perfectly-tailored tuxedo, with a black bow tie and crisp white fitted shirt He was always jaw-droppingly handsoht he was beyond spectacular He looked like a celebrity of yesteryear, the kind that people put up on a pedestal for their classic good looks

Jack stood in the doorway and sht of hi him in, I watched as Jack did the same to me I’d heard the phrase undress you with his eyes a thousand times before, but I never fully understood it until I watched Jack’s eyes take me in As was usual for Jack, he ence, which excitedto show you off and ht"

I smiled and rolled my eyes at him, but I secretly loved his possessive compliment

"Come here"

I looked at his face and knehat he wanted "Jack," I warned, "you’ll ive me just-fucked hair"

Jack raised his eyebrows, amused at oing to the AVN Awards Just-fucked hair is a good thing"

I laughed at his co to coet you?" Jack’s voice was low and a bitBut I kneorked He didn’t threaten If I didn’t give in, he would et what he wanted

Jack watched as I deliberated my next move in my head I saw the amusement in his eyes He was a lion who had his prey cornered and was thinking about playing with it for a while before he went in for the kill

"Jack!" I warned "I don’t want to wrinkle my dress"

"I’ll take it off" Jack took one step closer to me

"But we’ll be late"

"I’ll be quick" Another step closer to et afterwards"

"You look sexy as hell afterwards" One long stride and he was in my personal space

As promised, my dress wasn’t wrinkled when Jack helpedlate had its advantages too, because it et our picture snapped, so But Jack held raphers yelled for him to turn this way and that way for pictures Sonored like a master A few particularly obnoxious ones yelled, "Where is Jenna tonight?" and I felt Jack’s grip on hten each tie auditorium was set up with round banquet tables, each with almost two dozen seats I wasn’t surprised to find Jenna at our table, but it didn’t make me want to scratch her eyes out any less when she kissed Jack on the cheek and whispered so in his ear Jack introduced me to a few unfamiliar faces around the table, most of whom it was easy to tell were the "talent" But I wasn’t forced to participate in shts dimmed only a few ht, Cole Productions won more than a handful of awards and I was pretty sure they walked aith more statues than most of the other studios combined Jack never went up to accept an award, even when it would have been appropriate I noticed that ale, and inevitably took a turn in front of the raphy But not Jack, he didn’t edge his way into the liht of the people orked for hiround and supported them It made me even more proud to be with him because of the way he handled himself, rather than for the number of awards his company received