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"You were never a substitute," she said hoarsely

"I refuse to have a third person in our bed, Joss A dead man at that It’s occurred to me that any man would have done for you You don’t want to move on You just want someone to fk you and play master to your submissive Hell, it would have been just any ht at The House? It’s obvious you weren’t particular and any dick would have done"

"You’re wrong," she choked out, tears clouding her eyes and knotting her throat "And I’s to purposely hurt ely "It’s about time you hurt a tenth asto live up to a dead one? Jesus, Joss, even your safe word is a reminder of him As if you need him to protect you from me He’s constantly between us because you put hier"

"Are you saying we’re over?" she asked, her voice cracking,"After I told you I loved you?"

"I can’t go on like this any longer, Joss I’ve wasted far toothat will evidently never happen I can’t continue putting my life on hold for a woman ill never truly be mine I deserve better You deserve better And until you can put the past behind you for good and let go and hly through his hair, frustrated, heartbroken and pissed

Joss pushed herself up and hugged her knees together protectively, and it killed hiainst him But then hadn’t he just ripped her into the same shreds she’d ripped him into?

"I can’t believe you would be so callous," she said, tears slipping down her cheeks "You demanded my trust, expected it and would accept no less, but it’s obvious you haven’t given me that same trust you’ve de fro of himself in return And certainly not his trust"

"I guess that’s that then," he said savagely, furious that she was uilt that he shouldn’t He wasn’t the one holding back He wasn’t the one refusing to let go of the past

"Get out," she said in a low voice "Just get out Go to work Do whatever it is you do But leave oddamn it"

She went even paler and then rolled froht, Dash This is your house Your home Not mine It’s never beenbarriers between us, notyour stuff I’m out of here You’ll have the day to do whatever the hell it is you want to do"

With that he strode to the closet, yanking out pants and a shirt, not bothering with a shower He needed to get out before he said or did worse Before he did soiveness Like telling her it didn’t matter if he could never have all of her, that he’d take whatever she had to give He’d once thought that he could be satisfied with any part of her Any part at all He’d thought that so

He couldn’t--wouldn’t--settle for anything less than one hundred percent of her

Joss maintained her composure only until Dash sla her face in her hands as sobs tore from her throat

How could he love her and say all the horrible things he’d said? She’d been so careful not to put Carson between the Carson at all When before they talked easily about a man they both loved Now? It was as if Carson never existed because they never brought hiht For all he deiven her the sa Her trust Her love Her subift To protect her And yet he’d torn her apart with bitter, careless words

There was no going back No undoing what had been said His words rang in her ears, would always ring in her ears No ao away

She had to get out Couldn’t stay here a s in her suitcases and went about syste the entire house of her presence

But the things Dash had bought her, gifts, jewelry, clothing? She left it all neatly piled on his bed so he would see it when he returned and know she didn’t take a daht Not when she’d been willing to give hi freely and without conditions

She fu Chessy’s nuers She needed a shoulder to cry on Needed soh

"Hey, girlfriend How’s it going? Did you tell Dash the big news?"

A low sob welled fro? What’s happened? Where are you? Are you all right?" Chessy demanded

"I need you," Joss choked out "Are you home? Can I come over?"

"Of course, honey I’et you"

"No," Joss said in a low voice "I’ll coet there Give me half an hour, okay?"

"I’ll be here," Chessy said firet here I want to know exactly what happened, and you don’t leave a word out"

Joss agreed and then ended the call Shesure she hadn’t overlooked anything And then she e out to her car

When the last suitcase was stuffed into the passenger seat, she turned and stared back at Dash’s house one last time A house she’d considered her home for a brief, beautiful period of tihborhood drivingto be reckless and take unnecessary risks She pounded the wheel in frustration when an accident ahead backed traffic up She turned onto another street, intending to cut over and drive around the park It was longer, but with the slon in traffic, it would take her the sao traffic

She just wanted to be at Chessy’s, where she could pour out her grief to so had been yanked froht when the future had see black hole stretching as far as the eye could see

She didn’t see the child dart into the street chasing a ball until it was too late Horrified that she could hurt or kill the little girl, she yanked the steering wheel as hard as she could, not even having tih to blow out her front tire, and as she looked up, she saw the sprawling oak tree dead ahead There was nothing she could do Her tiny convertible hit the tree with a sickening crunch of lass Her head slaistered and as she blinked, blood slid down her forehead, clouding her vision