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He purses his lips "Vaguely"

"Well, he showed up at her dorot out of hand He hurt her and I lost it"

He glances ath my hair then rub my palms across my face "I went nuts and beat the shit out of hi froirl

We sit in silence for a moment and I think his inquisition is over, but then he pulls to a stop at the light and looks over at me

"You and Annie?"

I nod "Yeah Me and Annie"

"How long?"

I don’t kno to answer that Do I tell hio we kissed for the first time? Or just from yesterday e made it official?

My heart clenches I don’t know if there’s still a me and Annie

"A while," I murmur

"Huh I can’t believe you never mentioned it"

I presseyes I feel dead inside Nu for Annie, and when it finally happens, it’s all taken away She spent so much time in an abusive relationship How can she look at me, after what I did, and feel safe with me?

I was crazed and violent She’s probably petrified oflike that to Lucy," Park says, his voice dark, breaking intokill them"

I s forcefully I nearly did I would have if Annie hadn’t stoppedin that cell, next to Keith, waiting to stand trial for ive a shit what anybody tells you," he continues "You did the right thing"

Did I?

I’ht?

I don’t think so

I would do it again, but I’d handle it differently

After I got Loden off her, I should have picked Annie up and gotten her soe in front of her That rong I wasn’t thinking clearly Once I sahat he did to her, I just wanted to kill him, and I didn’t think past that

No What I did wasn’t the right thing

I fucked up

And now I h Loden otten his way after all

~~

I don’t knohether to call Annie or not If she doesn’t want anything to do with me then I’ll accept it I’ll understand I’ll just have to deal with it But I’er I can hold ontoat my phone for close to an hour, I decide to take the coward’s way, and text Guy

Me: How is she?

Guy: She’s ok As ok as can be expected We’re home Jenny wants her close for a few days Where are you?

Me: I’es

Guy: Rumor has it Loden’s parents went ape shit crazy over this Dad said they were trying to get all the charges dropped Yours and Loden’s

Me: WTF

Guy: I know Dad’s not sure of details, but they’re trying to make a deal They want this cleaned up quick

Me: He better not get off

Guy: I don’t see that happening Too et in?

Guy: Cops think so It wouldn’t be the first time

Guy: Glad you’re out of the pen

Me: Ha Me too

Guy: Thanks for being there For everything I know she’s a handful, but she’s kind of grown on e on my face

Me: Yeah Me too

I set my phone on the table and literally twiddle my thumbs I should have just asked hi ive her that I don’t want to, but I’ll give her space for now Let her get her s and I hurry to answer it, not bothering to look at the caller ID because I’m convinced it ?"

Heaven

I sigh, , drawn out release of breath

"Ouch," she says "I’lad you’re so happy to hear from me"

"Sorry," I rasp Damn it My heart is stuck in my throat I wish Annie would just call and put me out of my misery I can’t take this I stand up and pace in front of the couch My head feels like it’s about to explode and I want to scream I want to throw shit Instead I take a deep breath and use Annie’s trick, counting to ten

"Are you okay?"

"No I am not okay I’m not even in the ballpark of okay I fucked up so bad"

"What’s wrong? Talk tothat happened--what I walked in on, what I did, ht in jail, anddown I can be there in two hours"

Part of ht now and a shoulder to lean on and an ear to fill would be really nice right about now But Heaven isn’t the shoulder or the ear I want

"No," I say "I appreciate it, but I just want to be alone"