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Mal’s house was clearly a bachelor pad-slash-den of iniquity I’d had a vague notion tole speck of food in the house Beer filled the fridge and vodka the freezer Oh, no, there was a bag of oranges used as wedges to go with shots of vodka, apparently He’d ruled out touching those His super slick coffee ht He even had decent beans I ed hi three cups in the space of an hour, I felt a lot more like my old well-planned, caffeinated self

Mal dialed for pizza and atched TV late into the night Mostly he found his joy in : ood-naturedly We couldn’t go outside because a couple of photographers aiting on the beach I felt bad about it but he’d just shrugged it off

"What about this song?" he asked "You like this?"

Miranda Larinned "Miranda is ht "Really?"

More sniggering from Mal "You’re impressed I’ve met Miranda Lambert but you didn’t even knoho I was Honestly, woold and platinu you can take it"

He snorted

"You know, you reed to duck the bottle cap he flicked at me It bounced off my forehead "What was that for?"

"Can’t you at least pretend to worship ard forthe channels Ho, football, Gone with the Wind, and ood idea"

First my school pictures paraded past, followed by one of Lauren andacross the road fro elevated to the alhty status of David’s wife And then there was the uitar in his hands as he sang backup The lyrics were your typical ot s about hly uncoht to my chest

Mal leaned over and fluffed uitar, and writes the songs Girlies faint when he walks by Teaot the news of the week"

"I’h of a difference if they hype it just right" Mal sighed "Face it, child bride You got as by an Elvis impersonator to one of rock ’n’ roll’s favorite sons It was always bound to cause a shit stor on with the band lately … ith Ji et the picture But next week, so wacky and all the attention will uess so"

"I know so People are constantly fucking up It’s a glorious thing" He sat back with his hands behind his head "Go on, smile for Uncle Mal You know you want to"

I smiled half-heartedly

"That’s a bullshit s to fool anyone with that Try again"

I tried harder, s ’til my cheeks hurt

"Da on the front door interrupted ourhe’d take"

"What?" I trailed hi behind a divider just in case it was ed in, face tight and furious "You piece of shit You better not have touched her Where is she?"

"The child bride is otherwise occupied" Mal cocked his head, taking David in with a cool glance "Why the fuck do you even care?"

"Don’t start with ainst his friend I hesitated, hanging back Alright, so I skulked in a cowardly fashion Whatever

Mal crossed his arms "You left her to face Adrian and three lawyers on her own You, my friend, are most definitely the piece of shit in this particular scenario"

"I didn’t know Adrian would go at her with all that"

"You didn’t want to know," said Mal "Lie to everyone else out there, Dave Not me And sure as fuck not to yourself"

"Back off"

"You need some serious life advice, friend"

"Who are you, Oprah?"

Coughing out a laugh, Mal slu out cars, so stick around"

"What did she say?"

"Who, Oprah?"

David just scowled at hi Sad to say, even a scowling David was a thing of rare beauty He did things to s My heart tripped about in er and emotion in his voice couldn’t be concern forI had to be projecting and it sucked that I even wanted hiuy was the safest option all round