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I lift my head off the bed and lean up for his lips He jerks aith a gasp of dismay and scrambles offlike the irl alive Rejected in action and words

And why shouldn’t I feel that way? Suddenly, I see the girls he talked to in the hall at school Maybe he preferred his girls normal Normal and unmarked

He turns his back on me I stare at hiold strands falling against his neck "You think I’m safer there than here?" I dele It’s al awake and crawling My hand goes there, presses against the too-warm skin

He turns sideways, looks back at one already A stupid ache fills er my home Home is safety and I don’t have that any more than you do"

Before he can answer--if he even intends to--I leave the room Simon looks up from the kitchen table, hunkered over a bowl of cereal Milk dribbles froood-bye, but I don’t stop I can’t I can’t keep doing this Everyone I had is gone Everyone has turned from me and I can’t even find solace with another carrier

CNN Intervieith Harlan McAlister, forunh school with Kevin Hoyt, did you not?

HARLAN MCALISTER: Yeswe played football together He was captain of the JV team before we all found out he was a carrier It’s all just such a shock A real shaone pro

REPORTER: Can you tell us a little bit about Kevin Hoyt? What was he like?

HARLAN MCALISTER: Everyone liked him He was a real leader I mean, before, you knownot after

REPORTER: Are you surprised that he did so so brutal and horrendous?

HARLAN MCALISTER: Yeswell, no I ht, we all knew there was nothing he wasn’t capable ofright?

NINETEEN

MOM ORDERS PIZZA THAT NIGHT EVEN THOUGH it’s Mitchell’s twenty-first birthday and ays go out for sushi at his favorite restaurant Mom and Dad usually wink at the waiter and order mai tais for me and Mitchell This year, Mitchell could have ordered his drink himself

"Pizza?" I look at Mitchell froazine It’s strange having soMoazines "You don’t want your favorite spider roll?"

"Pizza is good Let’s get pineapple and ham" Mitchell shoots a quick look to Mom and smiles in a way that tells me they discussed this in advance

"You just don’t want to taketo be standing in her yard? Giving us the evil eye?"

"Davina, that’s not true," Ma for help

He sighs and props his hip against the counter "After last week" He motions to the s the tragedy There hasn’t beenthe faces of the four carriers They look about ht be in their twenties Three of the four are ie on their necksbigger and darker in their o back to school yet It just seeood idea to stay inside"

I nod and cross ht It makes sense I should just stay a hermit in my home"

"Davy" My brother doesn’t look at me in the careful way Mom does He’s too sincere for that Too honest Like the time he told Señora Ramirez the only Spanish he needed to knoas cerveza, el baño, and quiero sexo Yeah He was that high school boy "Don’t be a drama queen about it"

I start to leave the kitchen "Callas Morabs a remote and increases the volume on the television set The president stands there in the House cha for applause to settle A reporter drones on in whispered tones about this being the second time the president has addressed the nation since last week I watch nu, certain he ax on about loss and tragedy and prayers for the victims and families Which is why I don’t fully comprehend his words at first Not until he in to process

"for the protection of this great nation, the tiive full attention to the HTS threat so that we do not have a repeat of last week’s tragedy" There is a pregnant pause as the president stares out at the room "Detention of all carriers has become an ut at the screen, hearing nothing else "What does he mean?" I understand his words, but none of it seeaze riveted to the TV

"The Wainwright Agency in conjunction with the Depart as I speak to ahout the country and transfer the, but one that shall help us achieve the ideals upon which this great nation was foundedlife, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness"

Mitchell grabs the television and wrestles it fro with rage I watch, stunned asto the floor

I look up froe, chest heaving with exertion

"I’ll help you," he pants "We can run away, Dav"

"And go where?" I ask, a strange cal overan io No border I could cross No plane I could board Nowhere to hide