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He continues, "You shouldn’t have calledthat he’s wrong That there’s soood in others In him That I’m not alone I can’t be I don’t want to be

"Next tiain

His words inexplicably wound h I count hiht that ca my own kind--and I have to accept that I’ car lights up his face for a briefset to his jaw

"So you’re telling me to trust no one" I cross ht survive" Nodding, he slides hen up"

I can’t help thinking that telling an HTS carrier that she needs to toughen up is ironic Presu to snap

He slows in front of my house Like most homes in this area, it sits far back froate but doesn’t drive all the way down the driveway to the porch Probably a good idea

I open the noisy door and stick one leg out "Thanks for coet ain He doesn’t say those words, but he doesn’t need to He already did He made his point clear

As I walk down my drive and beneath the covered portico, I fish outthe temptation to peek behind hts batheset safely inside? That seems a little too courteous for a carrier who just vowed to never help ain

As I punch in the alarm and step inside, he reverses and drives away I lock the door behind loo the aroma of fresh-cut flowers on the foyer table

I ht I knoell Especially toward the piano, the first instrument I ever played I push back the lid and sink onto the bench I don’t need sheetthe hours of practice My fingertips sink down on the smooth, well-loved keys A soft swell ofI wrote a year ago I still reh I haven’t composed lately, too busy with school and voice lessons and Zac Now all those things are gone Lost to htly with the har half an hour later The last note hangs, reverberating in the silent roo into space until the only sound is the faint whir of fan blades from above

With one last caress for the keys, I rise and head upstairs Usually, Moht spills into the hallway froht puddle of yellow on the bloodred runner I have to pass the open door on the way to my roootten next to her A relieved breath shudders past my lips At least I don’t have to lie to her and tell her I had a great tih and dash her dreah all this

Even across the rooes beneath her eyes Her la it off when the eisters

I frown It’s not like Dad to work this late on a Friday Usually, he and Moether

I can’t help wondering where he is and if it has anything to do with me It has to be because ofDad’s been angry, stor doors At first, it made me feel better Proof that he cares Heto aveout to save hting with Moood about that That I’ where he iswhy he isn’t fighting with her now Have they moved on to avoidance? In soer That’s better than this silence

Walking intothat this is my life now I drop onit tightly

No one to trust No friends A life of silence broken only with rade yearbook:

To irl ever!!!

Looking forward to our senior year together! We’ll be unstoppable!

Love you to the moon and back, your BFF, Tori!

TWELVE

"DAVINA, COME UP HERE"

At the sound of e I pass Sean He arrived an hour ago I don’t look at him At least I don’t turn my face in his direction Fro in his notebook He doesn’t glance at me

Since Friday, I’ve taken his advice I haven’t talked to him I’ve tried not to look at hied with Gil, I haven’t said anything to anyone at school Brockman is the only one I talk to and just because I have to

Every afternoon, Brocknments to the office and collect any neork By Wednesday, I know the drill I guess today it’s o" Brock at me This has been his manner since the bathroom incident with Sean No inappropriate remarks He doesn’t so much as brush hands with ht back" He says that every tio

I nod and start to turn but stop at his, "Oh, wait" I watch as he digs soetRed"

I hold my hand out for the e into my jeans pocket and hurry away

The athletic hall, ripe with the ever-present aroirls heading into one of the gye and look me over like I’ face-to-face with a carrier I can’t ie froyray T-shirts A hawk, the school s stretched in flight

Their loud voices couy next to hispecial note ofto the boy beside hih and it makes my skin crawl