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"Where the hell is Jirape Popsicle I WANT MY FUCKING GRAPE POPSICLE!" Claire screao, cranky ass," I reminded her

Claire had been in labor for exactly one hour ONE HOUR and she was already losing her shit I feared for anyone within a mile radius of this wo out of her

"Co out of the hen her hand flew up to shten up, dude After today, you’ll finally be able to see your feet And just think of all the booze you can drink in the ht when you can’t sleep because he’s screa his fool head off"

Claire started to curse at h her and she had to concentrate on breathing instead of kicking rabbed onto her hand and let her squeeze the life out of it, watching the contractionher knohen it was al, just a few h and sluainst her pillows

She turned her head and stared ather eyes "I’m so scared, Liz"

I knew i a huht was scary andabout what happened after he was here She was a strong woman who could handle a few hours of pain, but I could tell just by looking at her that she was second-guessing her ability to be ato co to be FINE It’s going to suck for a while and you’re going to miss out on a lot of sleep and you’ll probably never take another uninterrupted shower or piss again, but it’s going to be okay, I pro to get through this You’ve gotto be there every step of the way No ht now, just reot you, babe"

Another contraction hit and I stood up, brushing her hair off of her face and helping her count through the pain I felt so helpless that I couldn’t o away, but it didn’tshe had to do on her own All I could do was be there for her and help her any way I could I decided that humor was always the best medicine I couldn’t take the pain froht about how horrific your vagina is going to look after you push that little guy out? Likein the breeze every tiina"

Claire atteet the words out She started laughing instead "Oh,to look like a wilted, roast beef sandwich"

"Jesus, I’ain Thank you for THAT visual," I told her with a shudder "On the bright side, it could be a great pick-up line ‘Hey, there hot stuff Do you like beef? I’ve got some in e stoina, the other white ina: it’s what’s for dinner!" I shouted

The doctor chose thatso hard ere crying and I shrugged eot ten to one odds right now that her vagina will reseround zero of a bo the privacy curtain around the bed to block the doorway "I’ressing How are the contractions?"

"They hurt like a ood That rabbed onto Claire’s legs when I saw a look ofthe good doctor in the face

Once he got the blanket pushed up over her knees, he snapped on a pair of rubber gloves and went to town between s

"Don’t look Whatever you do, you are NOT allowed to look down there," Claire threatened

She winced at whatever the doctor was doing and I winced right back in sy I wasn’t about to stick ot going on between your legs"

The curtain suddenly slid open "Who wants a grape Popsicle?!"

Claire and I both looked up at Jim and watched the smile on his face fall

"Oh, no," he muttered as the Popsicle dropped out of his hand and hit the floor

"OH, MY GOD! GET OUT! STOP LOOKING!" Claire and I both shouted at the sae

"Monster Help Popsicle scary," he s but the doctor was knee deep in vagina and there was nothing she could do

"GET OUT RIGHT NOW!" we both screale" style="display:block" data-ad-client="ca-pub-7451196230453695" data-ad-slot="9930101810" data-ad-format="auto" data-full-width-responsive="true">