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"Did you hear that? You al profound You cae of the bed "Leander liked to talk about the iuess it He’s famously lazy, you know, he lives like an absolute sloth Goes fro up the odd cri out in restaurants Going to parties" She said the ith such disdain that I choked on a laugh
"Parties! You knohat they say--first, the parties And before you know it, they’re on to the "
She rolled her eyes "Watson Some people don’t like to read Or they don’t like sport They don’t like the routine of it, or the slow pace, or the fast pace, or the noise Whether it seems too intellectual or too base But I’m an ano if I don’t like the idea that there are a deed on hoell I can provide theirl voice, she said, "‘Yes, please, I’d like the salmon, it looks lovely! Could I bother you for another soda? Ta!’ I hate the idea of perfor a role when I haven’t written the script et a chocolate pudding without the waitress calling the police onup the rest of that story later
"Leander excels at that kind of thing," she said, "because he has soood with people They like him They trust him almost immediately, and because he can pass as a normal sort of s, and people approve of him and move on" She looked at me "I’ve alanted to be invisible, and because I want to be, it’s impossible"
"What kind of life do you want for yourself?" I asked her "After all this? After school, after Lucien?"
She thought about it for a long minute I had no idea what she’d say Holmes had always had such a tenuous connection to her surroundings, like she wasaround her At school, she walked around with a backpack full of books, but they were like props in a stage play I knew, of course, that she had to go shopping for shoes and shaine a world where she did so, and last week I’d watched her triht herself to do it froine either of her parents showing her how But I couldn’t i at YouTube, either
Maybe it was justbecause the world hadn’t ever scratched up againstto disappear She used grocery-store-brand shampoo, I knew, because I’d used her shower back in Sussex, and I’d stood there s down on irl like that shopped at the same stores I did, because, despite my best efforts not to, I’d romanticized her beyond all sense, because even if I wasn’t in love with her, I couldn’t see ency," she was saying "A detective agency, a small one In London, because it’s the only proper place to live We’ll take back over Baker Street It’s a auche for them--but it would inal furnishings, so ouldn’t have to shop for them Furniture stores are horrid, aren’t they? And we’ll take cases You can deal with the clients, coether, and I’ll handle the finances, since you’re so terrible at maths" She paused "It sounds childish, when I put it that way I iine in practice it’ll feel rather adult"
"Is that it, then?" I asked her It cahts were loud and cluttered I’d never iined that she’d daydreamed like this, not the way I had "Is that what you want? I’ine the" She tipped her head back against the wall to look at me "You’re determined to take on all this responsibility forto think you like having a target on your back So if you insist on staying, I ht as well make a place for you I--"
I kissed her then
I kissed her slowly Patiently It was always too desperate between us, the clock nearing zero, the last secret about to slip out, or too cautious, or too clinical, an experi, kissing your best friend, and each tied to fuck it up so badly that the next felt even ive her an out I always did, especially after Dobson But God, it was hard When she leaned intothe hollow of my throat, I had to clench my hands not to touch her back Then she slipped a hand underneathwas co this? If ere just friends? You’d still co You’d be there, with me, in London Say you would"
"I don’t--we’ve never been just friends, though, have we?"
She s my eyes "You wouldn’t want me either way, then You wouldn’t want le" style="display:block" data-ad-client="ca-pub-7451196230453695" data-ad-slot="9930101810" data-ad-format="auto" data-full-width-responsive="true">