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I sneak back into the bedroo there He’s so beautiful He’s everything I want and everything I could ever need But I’m not sure what he needs Yes, I aets everything he has to have to get better To live And I’ him this the only way I can

His hair is tousled over his forehead I reht and wondering if his mother ever watched him like I do She had to He’s just so pretty Both inside and out He took care ofAnd I trust him so much But I need to do this

I brush the tears from my cheeks and steel uitar andThere’s still nothere, so I don’t guess it uitar I want to leave hi that will let hiainst the wall He’ll take care of it for ain anyway There will be no Julliard forThere will be me as arm-candy There will be a future, but not the one I want

I leave with nothing butI don’t take anything else, except for his AC/DC t-shirt, the one I wore the first night I met him I know it’s silly, but I want it I call for a cab before I walk downstairs In the city, you never can be too careful

I bounce from foot to foot I still don’t have a coat and it’s cold It’s still dark out There are no stars in the sky because of all the street lights The cab slows to a stop in front of , and I say a little prayer for Matt Logan will be all right He’ll survive this I’an will have Matt and the rest of his brothers

I take a deep breath and get in the cab I tell the cabbie to take h a private entrance He looks at s and takes me where I tell him I bypass security inside the airport, but we still have to go through security checks They call the plane, and the pilot assures the security guards that I will be traveling privately, and that they have ht of that But

My father’s own security guard is waiting at the bottom of the steps of the plane "Miss Madison," he says

"’Sup, Watkins?" I ask flippantly

He smiles "I like the hair"

"Look at it while you can, because Daddy will h I’m so tired I buckle up, because it’s what I’m supposed to do until we take off and stabilize The pilot coreet me I know him, too, but can’t relad you’re flying with me today"

"I’ets things started It’s early and still dark, so I can’t even watch the city pass hts, but they’re not what the city is to me This city is so o lay down in the bedroo, Emily?" Watkins asks I bury my face in my pillow so he won’t see , E"

I nod, my face still buried in my pillow

I sob until I aht They wake o to the bathroo up My dad is going to have a shit fit no matter what But I can at least look presentable

The limo pulls up beside the plane just as soon as it lands Watkins opens the door and I slide inside But then I stop My ether, as always Her brown eyes are not the ones I want to be looking into I want Logan’s blue gaze His are the eyes I want to see She looks at oes to sit with the driver He never does that Butmore than a look "Emily," she says crisply

"Mom," I reply

"You look like hell," she says And her face finally cracks into a smile

"Where’s Dad?" I twirl a lock of house I’er in charge of this little matter"

My mother never does this I didn’t think she had a spine at all "What?"

"Your father is the reason why you ran away froone forare the reason why I lost hter" Her voice cracks on the last word My mother never falls apart Ever But she does now Tears roll down her cheeks and she reaches forI need right now

"I’

"Mess me up I don’t care" She squeezes "

I sit back "You don’t want to hear everything"

She sighs "I can’t help you if I don’t knohat’s wrong"

"Mo She mocks my bored tone and says, "Well, there’s this boy…" She motions for me to finish

I tell my mother the story about why I left, where I’ve been, what I’ve been doing

At the end of my story, she says, "Your father still expects you to marry that boy"

I nod "I know"

"But that will never, ever happen"

My gaze shoots to her

"We’re going to the salon And then we’re going to take care of this"

"Mom," I breathe "I promised Dad"

She pats my hand "You’ll see Trust me" And for soe lossy pink instead of black, "because we don’t want to buck the systeet

When we’re done, I feel like my old self But I’ates are open I’m so confused There are news vans everywhere "What’s this, Mo this situation for you" She absently runs a hand down the length of irl, Emily You can make your own choices"

Tears prick at the backs of an said it

Logan

I’uitar is still here She was gone before I got up this s, except her guitar She wouldn’t have left, would she? Not for good Paul sits beside me on the couch and he knocks ernails "She’ll be back," he says "Stop worrying"

She won’t be back I’ht and lettingoodbye It hurts like nothing ever has when I realize that, but it’s true I’hts flash, signaling the ringer Paul runs to answer it "Matt says to turn the news on," Paul says, as he turns the TV on and flips the channels

The new anchor starts to talk I read the captions as they play across the bottom of the screen

IN CELEBRITY NEWS TODAY, THE PRODIGAL DAUGHTER OF ONE OF THE UNITED STATES’ MOST INFLUENTIAL BUSINESSMEN HAS BEEN FOUND ALIVE TODAY

"What does this have to do with us?" I ask Paul