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"I know you are, but--"

"You’re not fair! You never letdown his cheek, his botto "I love Ari and you made her leave!" He fisted his hands, and Matt saw himself in his son, so clearly Too clearly "I love her and now she’s gone!" Then he ran upstairs A moment later his door slammed

Every word his son shouted pierced his heart Especially when Noah repeated howMatt to hear each word He couldn’t pretend it wasn’t true

How ed? On the day Noah was born, he swore he’d never put his child through that As angry as he often became with Irene, Matt had never yelled at her in front of Noah

Yet he’d done just that with Ari

In one moment he’d snapped, and he hadn’t just sounded like his father--he’d actually turned into him As Noah had raced down the hill, Matt’s brain had played out all the terrible things that er, his pain He’d slammed his son as well, and stripped the joy from his accomplishment

"But he’s not ready," he whispered

Only, no one heard

Especially not Ari

He should have been packing up a bag with Noah’s swi he wanted to do Because without Ari, nothing seeone, all the sweetness that had filled his life for these few brief weeks was gone too He wasn’t even sure he could get Noah out of his roo him

If he and Noah went to the barbecue alone, the Mavericks would ask where Ari was, and he’d have to explain that she was gone And he’d have to do it as he re she’d done since she’d coames she played with hied him And the look on her face as she and Matt made love, the scent of her skin, the taste of her lips…

No He couldn’t let himself remember Not when it would only make him crazy

He was a Maverick--which meant he was a et Just as he’d force hio to the barbecue Because if he didn’t, it would be akin to ad his behavior hadn’t been justified

Noah wasn’t ready He just wasn’t

Yet so if maybe Matt was the one asn’t ready Who was he really protecting, his son…or hione froe in the space of five seconds? Why he’d been powerless to stop his reaction when the only thing he saas Noah’s crushed body? Because he didn’t trust himself to keep his son safe?

Da himself for the millionth time that he kneas best for his son

Matt looked at his watch It was ti Noah And they would have a good time whether they wanted to or not

Ruthlessly, he taain without Ari