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"Lexi! You feeling faint or so the attention froan to eye me weird I slowly shook my head and felt the hairs on the back of netic force, as I found myself drawn to face the Tide players’ bench And i my horrified face, left the bench, only to stand on the sideline, glaring atat his sides He was big, … He was fear and threat incarnate

It was like Austin was co just by his severe expression alone Lyle’s hand froze on my arm, and he hissed, "Seriously, why does Carillo look like he wants to kill you? I’ Lyle talk to me in worry and Austin slowly shook his head I understood his warning If you even speak a word of this to anyone, and I mean anyone, you won’t like the ton of fkin’ bad shit that coether, I turned to Lyle "It’s nothing, Lyle"

He scoffed "It sure don’t look like noth--"

Gripping both of Lyle’s ar hands, I snapped, "I said leave it!"

I instantly felt guilty I’d hurt my only real friend on the squad Lyle went to turn away, but I reached for his hand He stopped and turned to me, his freckled face flushed "I’m sorry I didn’tthe end of the gaet that you don’t wanna say, but believe uy He’s trouble with a capital T Whatever you did, whatever got his attention, just pray he forgets it pretty da of fans storhtail it into the tunnel leading to the locker rooht of Carillo still staring at me, his expression like stone, the rest of the players sprinting past himass of elated fans and headed to the locker rooht at the frat house Ally just passed on the e," I heard Tanya, vice-captain for the cheer squad, say to soirls yet?" the second voice asked

"Gonna do it now I can’t wait to get my drink on! Roiddy voice, and she and whoever she was speaking to left the bathrooton Stay hidden You cannot shoith the rest of the squad You cannot let them see how imperfect you are You think they will not see the fat? The cellulite? See how disgusting you are as they walk around unclothed with their perfect and tanned bodies

Squeezing my eyes shut, I rocked back and forth on the bathrooin vain to block out the torment of the voice

In the distance, I could hearwhat to wear to the party I envied the I’d been in here, hiding fro to be in the co to show my too-fat body It could have been hours orup, I strained to try and catch any sounds of

It was now silent, and I allowed , I unlocked the bathrooone, thank the Lord

Walking into the empty locker room, the smell of hairspray, perfu like a veil in the air Iout my cosmetic remover wipes, reen eyes were riht powder, and ht red, as red as the freshest of drawn blood This wasit at night was the worst part of every day

With each swipe of the cotton cloth, ave way to the pink skin ofback They always did

As I dropped the caked wipe into the sone

My eyes were firht-white porcelain of the basin, but I forced ht me this process was an important part of my recovery