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"You hardly discouraged it, Michael," I argue, feeling ht? Was it too "

He snorts "I’m a man, of course I was"

That hits ht have talked about sex a lot," I say,hurt, "but we shared so much, too We were close You can’t deny that"

"Honestly," he says, "I think you would have allowed that with anyyou what you needed"

That hitsthat it wouldn’t o along with it so long as sex was involved? Does he see me as that shallow? Am I that shallow? My heart twists in the ave a huge piece of ht I opened myself in a way I hadn’t before

Is that all he saw?

Is that all I put across?

"I can’t believe you’d say that," I snap, self-defence , I can’t believe you could honestly say that about e shared What the hell is wrong with you?"

"Don’t bla honest with you"

"I loved you!" I scream so loudly I scare even myself "You stupid, stupid piece of shit I loved you I ht e shared was real"

"I loved you, too, but we both know it couldn’t work"

"You’re a selfish, terrible person, Michael Maybe you did me a favour after all"

I end the call and throw s, I know this, but I’m not a slut and I’ I aave it all to Michael At least, I thought I did I thought he felt it I thought itmore than a bit of entertain

Fucking jerk

I turn to my side and pull my blankets up, and then I let the tears cory, raw, broken tears that don’t seem to ease the ache inis supposed to ease the pain inside, but it see The worst is the feeling of desperation, that one that claws at your chest and makes you feel worthless, it , it s on, even when all hope is lost

I’irl, da the pain consume me once more, until I fall into a fitful sleep

Soet better

One step forward, two steps back

~~~~

I wake up with an ache in lance over atthe sleep out of my eyes I stretch, rub at my chest, and then cli it up I see a couple of new es and my heart sinks If Michael has text, I don’t know if I want to read them I can’t face them I’m not even sure if I want to anymore They hurt too much

I slide htens a little

R – Morning Bestie

R – How are you?

I walk back over to

M – Hey! I’ht

R – What? What happened? Are you okay?

My heart warms at his kindness

M – Not really He said sos 