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Reading what Garrett wrotethat at the end of each email, he still loved me It soothed and tortured me at the sae his coot closer to the time forwhat it would be like to see Garrett I knew I couldn’t, because it would take only one look, one touch, and I’d sink right back into him I would throw out all of, and I’d let hiive in to my own selfish wants and needs

I decided to return ho ten days with my mother While I very et back to the things that comforted me My apartment, my job at Fleurish, Stevie and Sutton…Garrett

No, not Garrett, I remind myself with bitterness

On the day I flew out of Portland to return hoerly booted up my laptop to read Garrett’s e for ht, and I started eachoff with his written words

I sipped atfor his na

For the first time in a week, he hadn’t written to me

I checked my spaed throughme with the reality that I had co anything in return to Garrett, he was still bolstering hts

Theforaboutto do with the fact that I never responded to hiave hiot on the plane with a heavy heart and a confused s off with Garrett, so why should this botherexactly what I wanted hi on

But I couldn’t rejoice I was sad and heartsick and co ra…justhad come up and he couldn’t e and he would eht lift ht back hoht, coer for the next day to dawn

But there was no e after that

Or even the h theready forement, the subtle floral smells, and the way a creation coreat deal, but I’m a little hesitant to see his off with Garrett, but what little quips he’s dropped…he’s clearly not happy with ether, not only froht I had called Stevie to talk and he brushed otten hiht and he was on his way out the door He never calledby the way he see Garrett over me

When I arrive at work, Stevie ht sheen of moisture in his eyes As I step into his embrace, he coos at ain for that long"

And just like that, o over his connection to Garrett eases up

"I missed you too," I tell hihtly around each other When I pull away, I give him a critical once-over The air has turned cooler since we’re in the last week of Nove-sleeved black turtleneck with black skinny jeans and black Doc Martens He’s even wearing a pair of thick black plastic fra kind of like a depressed coffee-shop poet," I tell hi to the gaht Cold Fury colors, and I’d rather be shot than wear one of those big, bulky jerseys So unflattering Of course, I’ot to break up all this black"

"The ga away to walk back into the design area

"Garrett gave o cheervoice as he starts pulling the large buckets of fresh uncut flowers fro oily slithers through ht be jealousy "Garrett’s your boy now, huh?"

Stevie’s head snaps my way, and his eyes are wide The tone of my voice was flat and filled with censure, because it didn’t seem fair that I’d lost Garrett but Stevie still had him If Stevie was still friends with Garrett, that meant at some point I’d run into him, and I didn’t think I could handle that

"Do you have a proble his friend?" Stevie asks quietly

Yes, I want to scream at him, but I don’t, because I i to take away Stevie’s friendship