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He must have written the entries on Thursday, when he didn’t co up and I worried, wondered why he sounded so distant I was riveted
When I don’t see her, her ghost wanders my veins And when I see Mara today after a day apart, she is different
The word seeps into my blood
It is subtle--so subtle that I hadn’t quite noticed it myself until she mentioned it; perhaps I’es into relief and I watch her closely, so I can remember She is still beautiful--always--but her cheekbones are more prominent Her collarbone is dia filed away by so inside or outside, I don’t know
I don’t want to tell her She ca at the fair, after sos are precarious enough as it is
He wrote that yesterday
I tried to piece together the things he thought with the ht theain on the bottoet the kiss
It’s laughable I barely touched her but it was distressingly intimate She arched up toward me, but I placed my hand on her waist and she stilled under my palm I don’t think she’s ever looked so perilously beautiful as she did in that second
She isn’t the only one changing Every day she shapesa bed with her is its own exquisite torture I twine around her like moss on a limb; our heartbeats synchronize and we becosviolin, a cello’s loell It hubut clench my jaw, press my lips to her neck, and savour the trees as she slips into sleep Her sound is a siren’s song, calling me to the rocks
She thinks I don’t desire her and it’s alht her demons before I can prove it, lest I becohtens, rises; her breath and heart quicken with fear He fractured so inside of her and God knows, I will on because I can’t find hion My deht what Jude did to me hat made me afraid to kiss hio too far, it would haunt me the way Jude does now
He didn’t trust me when I said I wasn’t afraid of him He didn’t understand that I was only afraid of es On the thirteenth page, there was more:
My theory: that Mara can manipulate events the way I can manipulate cells I have no idea how either of us can do either thing, but nevertheless
I try to get her to envision son but she stares and concentrates while her sound never changes Is her ability linked to desire? Does she not want anything good?
Nighthting Mara as she draws in my bed She wearsthat I wouldn’t normally notice but with her inside of it, it is beautiful
The skin of her bare thigh glances against my arm as she shifts inI’e: