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"And, I don’t know, I thought Jarader--they were the saa to fawn over Noah to Jauy Let’s call him Kyle," she said, and her voice turned sharp "We’d been dating for, like, six months in total secret My parents would’ve hated hi sex Which lanced at the bathroo story short, at some point I probably missed a pill, then I was late, then boom, two pink lines I told Kyle, who said it wasn’t his proble around’" She rolled her eyes "A winner, clearly"

"Sounds like it," I said quietly

She half-smiled "I kneasn’t ready for a baby and that adoption wasn’t for me; I knehat I wanted, I was sure, but I just felt--alone" She leaned back against the wall and stared at me "I didn’t trust my friends to keep the secret, my parents would have lost it if they found out, and the idea of going to Planned Parenthood byit all in just made me feel--I felt screwed up" Her eyes hardened and she looked at the floor "Noah sawmachines at school--I was such aout to the poor kid" She sreat He used his connections and had an appointyn and he ithlike it was this ugly secret even though it hat I wanted and I was relieved" Her lips thinned into a hard line "Noah saw me on the way to lunch a few days later and asked hoas and I just burst into tears Jamie walked by, Noah walked away, Jaht Noah dumped me, and I was too upset to correct him"

I couldn’t stay quiet anymore "So you just let everyone think he screwed you over? After he helped you?"

Stephanie shook her head "I called Noah as soon as I got ho else, make up a different lie, but he said he didn’t care and the way he said it? I believed hih she didn’t smile "I think part of him actually wants to be hated He only ever shows you what he wants you to see He’s so closed off--it made me feel like he’d never tell"

"He never did tell," I said slowly "But why are you telling me?" Not that I didn’t appreciate it, because I did

Her Mona Lisa sest secrets you can only tell a stranger" She leaned against the painted gray wall and tilted her head Considered ht choice for ret it If you think I’ to hell, we never have to see each other again But it would hurt my parents if they knew, and Jamie--he’s awesome, and the most loyal person I’ve ever known But he’s a little" She scratched her nose, "He’s judghteous I love him to death, but he has this black-and-white worldview Like, he likes you a lot, but he was ragging on you earlier for being with Noah even knowing you’re going to have your heart broken--he holds onto stuff forever Noah definitely has his assaholic moments, and there’s a lot of darkness there; I’ve heard he’s done some seriously fucked-up shit Maybe he will break your heart, I’ed "But in the fallacious case of Noah Shaw vs Stephanie Roth? He’s not guilty," she said, heading for the door She put her hand on the handle "I just--watching you out there, with your brother--" she started Dropped a shrug "I just wanted you to know"

"Wait," I said, and her hand fell to her side "Why don’t you just tell Jaot other crap to deal with, and he’s taking this whole Horizons thing pretty hard Or rather, he’s taking the fact that our parents don’t believe a word he says pretty hard"

I knehat that was like

"Plus, he’s adopted, and I think it ht bother him"

I shook my head "I don’t think so I think he’d want to know the truth"

"There is no truth," Stephanie said mysteriously "Only perspectives Philosophy 101," she said with a wink

But despite her light tone, I could see that she was biting the insides of her cheek