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My throat tightened "Please tell uy in a Patriots cap"

I studied the screen again The cale only captured the top of Jude’s head Which was covered by the Patriots cap he alore Which was pulled do, shading his eyes

You couldn’t see his face at all

"But I heard his voice," I said Pleaded, really My brother opened his , but I cut him off "No, listen" I took a deep breath Tried to calm down, to be less shrill "I heard hi and the officer answered him back It was his voice And I saw his face" I stared at the screen, squinting as I continued to speak "You can’t see it so well on the tape, maybe, but it’s him It’s him"

Daniel looked at me for a few silent seconds before he finally spoke When he did, his voice was distressingly soft "Mara, it can’t be hih the facts, the ones I knew, the ones I was sure of "Why not? They couldn’t get to his body to bury it, right?" The building was too unstable, I reet to hiain

Daniel pointed at the screen, at Jude’s hands My eyes followed his finger "See his hands?"

I nodded

"Jude wouldn’t have any His hands were all they found"

4

HIS WORDS DRAINED THE BLOOD FROM MY FACE

"They didn’t find complete remains for any of the--for Rachel, Claire, or Jude But they did find--they found his hands, Mara They buried them" He sed like it was painful for hiuy? Two hands" Daniel’s voice was gentle and sad and desperate but his words refused to make sense "I know you’re freaked out about what’s been happening I know And Dad--we’re all worried about Dad But that isn’t Jude, Mara It’s not him"

It would have been a relief to believe that I was that crazy, to s that lie and their pills and shake off the guilt that had hounded me since I finally remembered what I was capable of

But I tried that before It didn’t work

I took a deep, shuddering breath "I’m not crazy"

Daniel closed his eyes, and when he opened theain, his expression wasdecided "I’m not supposed to tell you this--"

"Tellit a perceptual distortion," my older brother said "A delusion, basically That--that Jude’s alive, that you have the power to collapse buildings and kill people--they’re saying you’re losing the ability to rationally evaluate reality"

"Meaning?"

"They’re throwing around words like ‘psychotic’ and ‘schizotypal,’ Mara"

I orderedthat, worst case scenario, this is ht on by the PTSD and the shooting and all of the trau, the main differences between that, schizophrenia, and a bunch of other disorders in between is basically duration" He sed hard "Meaning, the longer the delusions last, the worse the prognosis"

I clenched my teeth and forced myself to stay quiet while my brother continued to speak

"That’s why Mom thinks you should stay here for a while so they can adjust your meds Then they can move you to a place, a residential treatment facility--"