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That night I bake chai sugar cookies with cinna cal It’s what I do when I don’t want to think about anything hard It is an activity that requires very little from you--you just follow the directions, and then at the end you have created soic Poof, deliciousness

Afterrack and put oninto bed to read when there’s a knock at o to theto check and see if I’ve locked it, but it’s not--it’s Peter! I push theup "Ohhere?" I whisper,"My dad’s ho a navy beanie on his head and a therrins and says, "Shh You’re gonna wake him up"

I run to my door and lock it "Peter! You can’t be here!" I am equal parts panicky and excited I don’t know if a boy has ever been in o

He’s already taking off his shoes "Just let me stay for a fewa bra and say, "If it’s only a few es this question Plopping down onyour Amish bikini? It’s so hot" I rabs s me to him He buries his head in my stomach like a little boy His voicebecause of me"

I touch the top of his head; his hair feels soft and silky against ers "It’s okay, Peter I know it’s not your fault" I glance at my moonbeam alarm clock "You can stay for fifteen o" Peter nods and releases me I sink down on the bed next to hio slow "Hoas the party?"

"Boring without you"

"Liar"

He laughs an easy kind of laugh "What did you bake tonight?"

"How do you know I baked?"

Peter breathes ar cookies with eggnog icing"

"Can I take soainst the wall He slides his arm around me, safe and secure "Twelve minutes left," I say into his shoulder, and I feel rather than see hiood" We start to kiss, and I’ve definitely never kissed a boy in my bed before This is brand-new I doubt I’ll ever be able to think of ain Between kisses he says, "How lance over at my clock "Seven minutes" Maybe I should tack on an extra five

"Can we lie down, then?" he suggests

I shove him in the shoulder "Peter!"

"I just want to hold you for a little bit! If I was going to try to do more, I’d need more than seven minutes, trust me"

So we lie down,around les his chin into the holloeenwe’ve ever done I like it so ilant that we don’t fall asleep I want to close ’s the freaking best," he sighs, and I wish he didn’t say it, because it makes me think of how many times he must have held Genevieve just like this

At the fifteen-minute mark, I sit up so fast he juo, buddy"