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I let out a sigh

That ht be difficult, I texted

He shot back not thirty seconds later A man…?

And I punched the bed with my fist

…takes care of business I reluctantly finished

Make it happen, and thank you, he shot back

I threw offpeace and quiet for once in the last twenty-four hours

I still couldn’t believe I’d hit my father I’d never done that before, even to defend myself that su another ry My father had accoain

I couldn’t think of myself as a father, now or any ti was for certain Whether it was now or ten years fro anyone else’s kids

But someday she’d want them Most people did

And I sed the baseball-size lu to be , and I was breaking and entering for the first time in my life Ofas I loaded the key into the lock and walked into the Brandts’ eo, and I was a little aggravated that I was late for school, too I’d hoped she’d be off early thiswhatever she did in the chemistry lab, but not today She’d left late, and noas behind

Tate’s dad wanted me to find out what she wanted for her birthday like ere friends or so to find out the ansas to ask her, and our relationship wasn’t on good foundations

So…I decided to snoop

Yep, that’s what I thought was a good idea

Check the history on her laptop, sift through her fking journal, h her drawers for open boxes of condo phone

Where r u?

Madoc

Late, I typed

Closing the back door and slipping h the kitchen and over to the stairs

She was everywhere The smell of her shampoo--like warm strawberries-- from Tate all weekend The truck had been in the driveway, but she see breath before I entered her room Not sure why

All I kneas that I felt turned on and perverted all at the saet out

I wasn’t a puy I had the guts to sneak through sohout the otherwise neat room, and she’d added some more pictures and posters to the walls since I’d been in it

My eyes roamed the space as I sloalked around, and I saw her laptop but bypassed it and sat down on her bed instead

My throat was dry

Fuck

I picked this ht reveal exactly what I needed, or itface crea soes far away

I decided to start slow and opened her bedside table drawer instead

There was some hand lotion, a small bowl full of rubber bands, some candy, and…a book

I pinched my eyebrows and picked up the tattered, faded paperback that I hadn’t seen in years, but it seemed like just yesterday

Me it in her backpack on her first day of junior high

Tate trying to read so at the lake

Tate’s dad taping the binding when Madman had run off with it

The book--Leaves of Grass by Walt Whited to her mom, and Tate always kept it close She used to take it with her anyties, I searched for the poem--the only poem--that I liked I couldn’t ree

No sooner had I started flipping through when soot the book and picked up the photos off my lap instead

My heart pounded in the back of my throat

Jesus

It was us

The pictures were of her and me There were two, both ere twelve or thirteen, and a ton of fking emotions fell on me at once

Tate kept pictures of me?

They were in her mother’s book that she treasured

And she’dwith the book that held the like they were stuck in a bucket of cement

She kept pictures of us like I kept pictures of us, and I s

And then the tiptoeing-through-the-fucking-tulips feeling that I was enjoying crashed to the ground as soon as I spied a black lace bra lying on her dresser The tingling sensation of so across my heart moved south, and noanted to leave here in search of her

My jaw ue to keep erie

Her sleek body dressed in black lace blanketed my brain, and then I blinked

Wait

Realization dawned

Tate wore lingerie

Tate Wore Fucking Lingerie!

What the hell for? And for who?

I ran a rough hand through my hair and felt the sweat on ive her soer wants for their birthday, isn’t it?