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Although the scenic stretch of eles is forever etched in my mind, it still captures my attention every time I drive past it The exhilaration I feel when I see the crashing surf or the transcendent vision of the jagged shoreline is soet tired of It’s easy to lose yourself in its beauty--in fact, the sight helps to calht lit by streetlights overhead always sees in perspective for ure out exactly what I was going to say to S’belle when I saw her But now looking out to the distance, I know I’ll do whatever it takes topast toates, the SLS Hotel is perched on a secluded coastal bluff The guard waves me forith a pass of my ID My car makes the mountainous climb and when I reach the top I valet it and head to the sixth floor S’belle ed to score exclusive access not only to the rooftop pool but also the hotel’s restaurant conveniently located on the rooftop The elevator dings andparty is in full swing Looking around, I notice right ahat S’belle had been so excited about--the place looks ical The pools have been turned into usable space With pieces of Plexiglas covering the from beneath them, one pool has been turned into a dance floor and the other a stage for the band
I take deep cal breaths and search the space for her My eyes land on the restroom and I decide to slip inside there first What the hell am I so nervous for? I splash cold water oninto the reflection of the face of the man I haven’t seen in over a year The irl from me The same man Dahlia chose to marry And up until today I didn’t realize she must love hiht now, strangely enough, I’reen eyes narrow on me as he takes another step inside His resemblance to Bell is unbelievable Their facial features, skin tone, and eye color are so ht now I see it clearer than day
"What are you doing here?" he asks His tone is even and controlled
Trying not to letto upset anyone, I look at him and say without pretense, "I came to talk to your sister"
His bow tie is undone and hangs to either side of his collar His eyes look slightly glassy as though he aze makes me feel we are in some kind of silent stare-down But I don’t averthe’s trying to gauge ers tighten into fists and think, Fuck, I’ "Did you tell her you were coet to me
"Then I think you should leave"
"I need to talk to her" I’, about what happened, but I don’t like the i atmoments
His face is like stone "If you hurt ive him a chance to finish, because the words leave ht "I would never hurt her I love her"
My knees start to shake and I grab the counter to steady myself as it occurs to me that I need her in my life because I love her in a way I’ve never loved anyone The part of o didn’t I just couldn’t find it
That’s how I feel about her She’spiece-- that I haven’t been able to figure out Fuck me It’s not the same kind of love I felt for Dahlia What I feel for S’belle is so ht It’s not so the love for one wohts aside, knowing all thatsure she’s in my life, because without her I don’t feel whole
The shock on his face has toto find your sister now," I tell hily even tone Then I walk past hilance
Ivy plants are scattered through the roo beside paper lanterns Banners reading HAPPY NEW YEAR and CONGRATULATIONS, XANDER AND IVY are wrapped around the chairs Chane bottles, party hats, and noise blowers decorate the tables along hite candles of all shapes and sizes But what I notice old and silver confetti that dusts the floor and all of the wedding guests It looks as though theyon the clear platform over the pool that makes them look suspended in air, I spot her parents first Charlotte has her arives me a wave and Jack nods hello My breath hitches whenbeside the down her back
Tilow from the dance floor beneath me She’s all I can see as I drink her in A vision of beauty, she’s wearing a long silver satin dress that skims her body to perfection Her back is bare and her skin looks soft and smooth As my eyes drop, so does my heart So just above her ass I nearly juertips caress the dip at the bottom of her spine
As if she senses reen eyes flash in surprise, but her gaze catches mine and holds it In that moment I see what I’ve soo that she looked at ht that since the first tiht now that I really understood it It has to be because she loves uy with his arms around her is tall, with dirty blond hair and a spray of freckles across his nose He’s wearing a white T-shirt with a screen-printed bow tie on it, black scuffed boots, and a tux with his jacket unbuttoned His skinny don biker look makes my blood boil Has she alreadyto cales from a slow ballad to an upbeat tempo and more people rush the dance floor I keep my eyes pinned to her, and when I’s, I slowly uy who still hasn’t reers fro She pops up on her toes and whispers so to him He nods and finally drops his hands
Sheand begin to move closer and her eyes widen as she watches my every step People cross the space between us, but I don’t notice their faces; I only see her She runs her hands down her arh she’s cold I increasein front of her, my words catch and stick in my throat
A mix of emotions crosses her face, but she seems to settle on confusion Myhat to say, how to say it Shit, Casanova I’ here?" A tear leaks from her eye and flon her cheek Her voice doesn’t sound accusing or angry; it’s soft as though she’s genuinely surprised to see ently wipe the tears away "You invited ht of the situation, ht of the fact that I haven’t called her in a week, that I’m about six hours late, that I didn’t pick her up--that I’m an assle
"I can’t do this," she says, and rushes away