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"I’ to be Catherine Zeta-Jones’s stunt double!"

"I don’t even understand how you can fit all this stuff in here Don’t you ever chuck things out?" She picks up a pair of shoes decorated with shells "I mean, these Do you ever wear these anymore?"

"Well… no" I see her expression "But that’s not the point If I did chuck them out, then shells would come back in the next day -- and I’d have to buy a new pair So this is like… insurance"

"Shells are never going to coht! It’s like the weather You just can’t tell"

Suze shakes her head, and picks her way over the piles of stuff on the floor toward the door "I’ you two hours and when I come back I want to see a transformed room Transformed room -- transformed life Now start!"

She disappears out of the roo disconsolately around at my room

Well, OK, maybe she does have a point Maybe I should have a little tidy-up But I don’t even knohere to start I s out just because I never wear the

And it’s all so hard It’s all so much effort

I pick up a juain Just the thought of trying to decide whether to keep it or not exhausts ?" comes Suze’s voice froood!"

Co OK, maybe I should start in one corner, and work my way round I pick my way to the corner oftable, and try to work out what everything is There’s all that office equipment I ordered off the Internet… There’s that wooden bowl I bought ages ago because it was in Elle Decoration (and then saw exactly the sa body rubs… What is all this stuff, anyway? What’s this box which I haven’t even opened?

I open up the package and stare at a fifty-meter roll of turkey foil Turkey foil? Why would I buy that? Was I once planning to cook a turkey? Puzzledly I reach for the letter on top, and see the words, "Welcoood friend, Mrs Jane Blooue to you…"

Oh God, of course It’s just that stuff Muift A casserole dish, so patio cushions into… so on a s again A wo proudly at me over a shrink-wrapped duvet, and a bubble from her mouth reads, "With up to 75 percent reduction, I have so much more room into the broo roo on the sofa with Tarquin, talking earnestly

"Tarquin!" I say, and both their heads jerk up guiltily "I didn’t hear you arrive"

"Hello, Becky," he says, not ," says Suze, giving me an embarrassed look "Have you finished?"

"Erht I’d hoover ood!"

I shutRight This should be nice and easy Just stuff the, it says -- but frankly, who’s going to count?

I start to stuff clothes into the first bag, until it’s as tightly packed as I can get it Panting with effort, I close the plastic zip -- then attach the hoover nozzle to the hole And I don’t believe this It works It works! Before !

Oh, this is fantastic This is going to revolutionize my life! Why on earth declutter when you can just shrink-wrap?

There are eight bags in all -- and when they’re all full, I cram theht squash -- and I can hear a bit of a hissing sound as I force the door shut -- but the point is, they’re in They’re contained

And just look at my room now! It’s incredible! OK, it’s not exactly immaculate -- but it’s so much better than it was before I quickly shove a few stray itee some cushions on top, and stand back As I look around, I feel all warood before And Suze is right -- I do feel different, sole" style="display:block" data-ad-client="ca-pub-7451196230453695" data-ad-slot="9930101810" data-ad-format="auto" data-full-width-responsive="true">