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I arrive at a street corner and come to a standstill A lit-up taxi crawls past -- but for soe reasonfake designer sunglasses, and I feel a sudden pang of longing to go and rifle through the a discount on Calvin Klein jeans And I do actually need some new jeans… And I haven’t even been into Dean and Deluca…

Oh, why couldn’t the Guggenhei pastfixed to the facade above an entrance I don’t quite believe what I’e as life It’s like God heard enheienheims?

As I hurry toward the doors, I realize this place looks quite senheim Maybe it’s some trendy SoHo offshoot! Yes! I mean, if London can have the Tate Gallery and Tate Modern, why can’t New York have the Guggenheienheim SoHo? That sounds so cool!

I cautiously push the door open -- and sure enough, it’s all white and spacious, witharound quietly, whispering to one another

You know, this is what all museums should be like Nice and small, for a start, so you don’t feel exhausted as soon as you walk in I mean, you could probably do this lot in about half an hour Plus, all the things look really interesting Like, look at those alass cabinet! And this fantastic abstract print, hanging on the wall

As I’ly at the print, a couple co to each other about how nice it is Then the girl says casually, "How much is it?"

And I’m about to turn to her with a friendly smile and say, "That’s what I alant to know, too!"--when to my astonishment the man reaches for it and turns it over And there’s a price label fixed onto the back!

A price label in a museum! I don’t believe it! This place is perfect! Finally, soreed with me -- that people don’t want to just look at art, they want to knoto write to the people at the Victoria and Albert about this

And you kno that I look around properly, all the exhibits seem to have a price on theot a price label, and so has that chair, and so has that… that box of pencils

Hoeird, having a box of pencils in a museum Still, maybe it’s installation art I walk over to have a closer look -- and there’s soful e about art, or life… I lean close, interested, and find enheim Museum Store"

What?

Is this a--