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Her eyes widened in surprise that her brother Nevare ht have dreams not fit to discuss with a lady, but I also saw her pleasure that I had referred to her as a "lady" rather than as a "child" She sat back in her seat and said, "Well, if it is so, Nevare, then I will not ask you any more about it"

Such innocents we both were then

Days piled on days to beco atop one another to becoot it as much as I could My burns healed, the stitched ear healed more slowly, and the notches became scars I lived with I kept a small bald spot on the crown of my head, scar tissue where once-healthy scalp had been II carried inside e thatwords to me, doubted me His doubt became my own, a competitor I could never quite conquer

I made only one other concession to that experience Late in the fall, I toldalone, to test my prowess He told me it was foolish, but I persevered in rantedthe high banks of the river, and I did begin my journey in that direction I first visited the spot where Dewara and his women had been camped when I first met him The ashes and stones of a cook fire and the disturbances where he had pegged his tent were ale The sheath of round, the leather slowly rotting in the weather Of the sword itself, there was no sign Perhaps a passing traveler had discovered it But it seemed unlikely that someone would come across a sword and its sheath and carry off only the bare blade I didn’t think so I tossed the sheath back onto the ground and walked away from it A man could not summon a weapon to come to him Not in my world I felt a touch of pain in the scar on my head I rubbed at it, and then turned away from the campsite I didn’t want to think about it just now

I turned Sirlofty’s head inland The prairie had changed with the season, but I allowed for that, and roughly calculated how long it would take Sirlofty’s gentle, long-legged lope to travel the distance the taldi allop For the first two days I rode steadily, pushing Sirlofty in the ently in the afternoon The autu spots more plentiful than they had been when last I crossed this terrain Tiny rivulets had resues I had expected this lonely journey to bring my memories back and letstranger and more incomprehensible

I found, eventually, the same spot where Dewara had built the final fire we had shared I was certain of it I cae of the cliffs and looked out over the vista The scorched rocks fro up around them I found the burned ends of the Kidona fire-bow I hadhe had givenKidona that he had given to ned to the flaht about that for a time, and also about how he had shot the mare I had ridden Did it mean that I had somehow tainted Keeksha, made her unfit for use by a Kidona warrior? Dewara had left me no answers, and I knew that the ones I made up for myself would always re life and li for the entrance to the cave I had thought it through and decided that there e, a place we had ju had made me hallucinate I was certain of that explanation

I found nothing I did not find a ledge that I could comfortably stand on, let alone the place I had jumped down to and the cave I had entered They didn’t exist I cli off to the distant river All of it had been a dreaht on by the fumes of whatever Dewara had burned on the fire All of it, every bit of it I ood flint and steel, and spent the night at the site, but did not sleep Rolled in ht sky and wondered about the things savages believed and if the good god had soiven us Or did the good god reign over theer, and had I visited one of the worlds of those pagan deities? That thought sent a shiver up my spine in the dark Were those dark and cruel worlds true places that existed, but a dream step away?