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"No thank you I’ood with the tea" She studied him intently, like he was a mystery to solve "Thathim and realized… She knew He hadn’t told her about his alcoholism, but somehow she’d learned about it on her own Of course, the woent Apparently there wouldn’t be any secrets froure it out?" He forced hih he wanted to charge right over to her side and ask if this was a deal breaker "I wasn’t holding back; just waiting for the right tih I wasn’t certain until now I understand if you’d rather not talk about this" She stared back, her gaze accepting, open Sympathetic "Men use half as many words as a woreen eyes glinted like dewy grass And then he recalled what she’d said about having trouble expressing emotions, like her father

So she rolled out studies to bolster those feelings she didn’t kno to express

So that felt like… affection? So different fro ure out what he wanted to say next "I’ra that ti sober… and talked and talked and talked I went to AA--I still go whenever I can uessing there isn’t a weekly group three doors down in some of the places you’ve been sent by the rateful for levity to ease the tension, "that was a pretty good joke"

"I was serious"

"Oh, uh, sorry?"

She smiled "Got you that time"

He smiled back, so damn entranced by this woman who already understood him better than anyone he could remember "You still surprise " Her eyes lit with more of that tenderness that poured over hi about your drinking Perhaps we could begin hy you started"

She sounded so clinical So precise But instead of being put off by that seeh ti into his past crap because she genuinely wanted to know Maybe she even cared

"Stella, you know about statistics and studies People can be genetically predisposed to alcoholism" Maybe she would deal better with the et wasted every Friday night and then when he needs to stop, no big deal Then someone else drinks half as much only to learn he’s totally hooked and the doard spiral starts"

"You’re saying it’s in your DNA?"

"My eneration as far back as I can trace" What a legacy He felt the weight of it all theif the words would send her running "The stories people tell in AA about what triggered it for them… I don’t have that story It just happened One day I was hanging out with the guys drinking and the next day I realized, holy shit, I couldn’t quit"

"You said your mother was an alcoholic" She reached across the table and he could see her frustration at not being able to touch him "That had to have left its marks on you as an adult"

Down on the street, a shrill horn honked right beneath the terrace, louder than the steady drone of shouts and voices from the marketplace beside the ancient, storied river Jose peered over the balcony, the scent of spicedfrom a vendor’s cart

"Don’t try to make excuses for me My dad held a steady job as therapist--there’s irony in that, don’t you think?" The old saying about not being able to cure your own fary Moot tougher for her, Dad always brought supper hoh money to look after me while he was at work"

Except she’d eventually used that money to buy booze for herself

Stella sat quietly, just listening, never judging even though he judged himself He refused to bla his fa in the et out just like I did Except she left the Army when she went into rehab for the second tin over custody of her two children"

Now that part made her forehead furrow

"How old were you when you quit drinking?"

"Twenty-two"

"So that means you’ve been sober for five years" Her forehead smoothed "That’s quite an acco an alcoholic I can never allowhere? Hoas trying to tell her he couldn’t risk ending up like his mother or his sister, unable to care for their children He was scared as hell to risk failing as a parent He was going to ht of it all piled on top of hi to smother hi air and space

Stella touched his araze zeroed back in on her fast She looked at hi, or at least he hoped so, damn it