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My , and please, please - try not to over-think things Relax and enjoy yourself You are so young, sweetheart You have so much of life to experience yet, just let it happen You deserve the best of everything" Her heartfelt words are co whispered in my ear She kisses my hair
"Oh, Mo to her
"Darling, you knohat they say You have to kiss a lot of frogs before you find your prince"
I give her a lopsided, bittersweet smile
"I think I&039;ve kissed a prince, Moives -motherly-absolute-unconditional-love s again
"Ana - they&039;re calling your flight," Bob&039;s voice is anxious
"Will you visit, Mo - soon Love you"
"Me too"
Her eyes are red with unshed tears as she releases ate - I do not have tilance back But I do and Bob is holding
down her face I can no longer holdh my watery tears
Once on board, in the luxury of first class, I curl up in my seat and try to compose myself It is always painful to wrench anized, but newly insightful, and she loves me Unconditional love - what every child deserves fro out my BlackBerry, stare at it despondently
What does Christian know of loveSeeet the unconditional love he was entitled to during his very early years My heart twists, and h n flashing on his forehead She thinks Christian loves me, but then she&039;s my mother, of course she&039;d think that She thinks I deserve the best of everything I frown It&039;s true, and in aclarity, I see it It&039;s very simple: I want his love I need Christian Grey to love me
This is why I am so reticent about our relationship - because on sonize within me a deep-seated compulsion to be loved and cherished
And because of his fifty shades - I a myself back The BDSM is a distraction fro, he&039;s wealthy, he&039;s beautiful, but this is all less without his love, and the real heart-fail is that I don&039;t know if he&039;s capable of love He doesn&039;t even love hi the only form he found - acceptable Punished - whipped, beaten, whatever their relationship entailed -
he feels undeserving of love Why does he feel like thatHow can he feel like thatHis words haunt row up in a perfect family when you&039;re not perfect&039;
I close in to coed too much What have I confessed to Christian in my sleepWhat secrets have I revealed?
I stare at the BlackBerry in the vague hope that it will give ly, it is not very forthco As we haven&039;t taken off yet, I decide to email my Fifty Shades
From: Anastasia Steele
Subject: Homeward Bound
Date: June 3 2011 12:53 EST
To: Christian Grey
Dear Mr Grey
I aain ensconced in first class, for which I thank you I a, and perhaps torturing the truth out of you about my nocturnal admissions
Your Ana x
From: Christian Grey
Subject: Homeward Bound
Date: June 3 2011 09:58
To: Anastasia Steele
Anastasia, I look forward to seeing you
Christian Grey
CEO, Grey Enterprises Holdings Inc
His response makes me frown It sounds clipped and formal, not his usual witty, pithy style
From: Anastasia Steele
Subject: Homeward Bound
Date: June 3 2011 13:01 EST
To: Christian Grey
Dearest Mr Grey
I hope everything is okay re &039;the situation&039; The tone of your e
Ana x
From: Christian Grey
Subject: Homeward Bound
Date: June 3 2011 10:04
To: Anastasia Steele
Anastasia
The situation could be better Have you taken off yetIf so you should not be e yourself at risk, in direct contravention of the rule regarding your personal safety I meant what I said about punishments
Christian Grey
CEO, Grey Enterprises Holdings Inc
Crap Okay Jeez What is eating hione AWOL, maybe he&039;s dropped a few million on the stock market - whatever the reason
From: Anastasia Steele
Subject: Over-Reaction
Date: June 3 2011 13:06 EST
To: Christian Grey
Dear Mr Grumpy
The aircraft doors are still open We are delayed but only by ten ers around me is vouchsafed You may stow your twitchy palm
for now
Miss Steele
Froies - Twitchy Palm Stowed
Date: June 3 2011 10:08
To: Anastasia Steele
I miss you and your smart mouth Miss Steele
I want you safely home
Christian Grey
CEO, Grey Enterprises Holdings Inc
Froy Accepted
Date: June 3 2011 13:10 EST
To: Christian Grey
They are shutting the doors You won&039;t hear another peep froiven your deafness
Laters
Ana x
I switch off the BlackBerry, unable to shakeis up with Christian
Perhaps &039;the situation&039; is out of hand I sit back, glancing up at the locker where , with ift to say thank you for first class and for the gliding I s -
that was soive ht think it&039;s childish - and if he&039;s in a strange er to return and apprehensive of what awaits h all the scenarios that could be &039;the situation&039;, I becoain the only eht crosses ht have purchased the adjacent seat so that I couldn&039;t talk to anyone I dis, that jealous, surely I close my eyes as the plane taxis towards the runway
I eht hours later to find Taylor waiting and holding up a board that reads Miss A Steele Honestly! But it&039;s good to see hireets me formally, but I see a hint of smile in his sharp brown eyes
He looks his usual immaculate self - smart charcoal suit, white shirt, and charcoal tie
"I do knohat you look like Taylor, you don&039;t need a board, and I do wish you&039;d call s, please?"
"No, I can hten perceptibly
"But, if you&039;d betherabs my backpack and my newly acquired wheelie case for the clothes ht h He&039;s so polite I reh I would like to erase it froht ht unsettles ht me underwear Even Ray&039;s never had to endure that hardship
We walk in silence to the black Audi SUV outside in the airport parking lot, and he holds the door open forsuch a short skirt for the return to Seattle was a good idea It was cool and welcoia Here I feel exposed Once Taylor has stowed s in the trunk, we set off for Escala
The journey is slow, caught up in rush hour traffic Taylor keeps his eyes on the road ahead Taciturn does not begin to describe hier
"How&039;s Christian, Taylor?"
"Mr Grey is preoccupied, Miss Steele"
Oh, this old
"Preoccupied?"
"Yes, lances atno htlipped as the control freak himself
"Is he okay?"
"I believe so,me, Miss Steele?"
"Yes, ma&039;am"
"Oh, okay"
Well, that curtails our conversation, and we continue in silence I begin to think that Taylor&039;s recent slip, when he told me that Christian had been hell on wheels, was an anom-aly Perhaps he&039;s embarrassed about it, worried that he&039;s been disloyal The silence is suffocating
"Could you put some music on please?"
"Certainly, ma&039;a soothing"
I see a sain in the mirror
"Yes, ma&039;a wheel, and the gentle strains of Pachelbel&039;s canon fills the space between us Oh yes this is what I need
"Thank you" I sit back as we drive slowly but steadily along the I-5 into Seattle
Twenty-five minutes, later he drops me outside the impressive fa?ade that is the entrance to Escala
"In you go,the door open for e is"H expression is soft, warm, avuncular even
Jeez Uncle Taylor, what a thought
"Thank you forme"
"It&039;s a pleasure, Miss Steele" He s The doorman nods and waves
As I ride up to the thirtieth floor, a thousand butterflies stretch their wings and flutter erratically in my stomach Why am I so nervous And I know it&039;s because I have no idea what kind of oddess is hopeful for one type of ht with nerves
The elevator doors open, and I&039;e not to bethe car In the great roo quietly as he stares out of the glass doors at the early evening Seattle skyline He&039;s wearing a gray suit with the jacket undone, and he&039;s running his hand through his hair, he&039;s H agi-tated, tense even Oh no - what&039;s wrong Agitated or not, he&039;s still beyond beautiful How can he look so arrestingIt&039;s such a pleasure to stand and drink in the sheer sight of him
"No trace Okay Yes" He turns and sees es
Fro else: a look that calls directly to ray eyes blazing
My oes dry and desire blooms in my body whoa
"Keep me informed," he snaps and shuts off his phone as he strides purposefully toward me I stand paralyzed as he closes the distance between us, devouring &039;s amiss - the strain in his jaw, the anxiety around his eyes
He shrugs out of his jacket, undoes his dark tie, and slings them both on to the couch en route tos the hair tie painfully out of my hair, but I don&039;t care There&039;s a desperate, primal quality to his kiss He needs me, for whatever reason, at this point in time, and I have never felt so desired and coveted It&039;s dark and sensual and alar all at the saers twisting and fisting in his hair Our tongues entwined, our passion and ardor erupting between us He tastes divine, hot, sexy, and his scent - all body wash and Christian is so arousing He drags his ripped by so?" I breathe
"I&039;lad you&039;re back Shoith me - now"
I can&039;t decide if it&039;s a request or a corabsroom into his bedroom to his bathroom
Once there, he releasesin the far too spacious shower
Turning slowly, he gazes at me, eyes hooded
"I like your skirt It&039;s very short," he says, his voice low "You have great legs"
He steps out of his shoes and reaches down to take each of his socks off, never taking his eyes off er in his eyes Wow to be this wanted by this Greek god I mirror his actions and step out of ainst the wall Kissinghis hands into my hair I feel the cool, sainst me so that I&039;m flattened between his heat and the chill of the ceraroans as I squeeze tightly
"I want you now Here fast, hard," he breathes, and his hands are on ?"
"No" I flush
"Good"
His thumbs hook over my white cotton panties, and abruptly he drops to his knees as he tugs them off My skirt is now rucked up so that I&039;rabs ain, and kisses hs, he forcesers find their way into this hair
His tongue is relentless, strong and insistent, laving ain - non-stop It&039;s exquisite, the intensity of feeling - it&039;s almost painful My body starts to quicken, and he releasesat hirabsue intohis fly, he frees hihs, and lifts s around ent, strained
I do as I&039;m told and wrap my ar ers digging into ins to move, slowly at first - a steady even tempo but as his control unravels, he speeds up faster, and faster Ahhh! I tip , heavenly sensation pushing her, up and when I can take nointo an intense, all-consurowl, and he buries his head inloudly and incoherently as he finds his release
His breathing is erratic, but he kisses , still insideinto his eyes As he co me steady while I place my feet on the floor The bathroom is now cloudy with steam
and hot I feel overdressed
"You seem pleased to see me," I murmur with a shy smile
His lips quirk up
"Yes, Miss Steele, I think et you in the shower"
He undoes the next three buttons of his shirt, res it over his head, and discards it on the floor Re his suit pants and boxer briefs, he kicks theins to undo the buttons onto reach out and stroke his chest, but I contain myself
"Hoas your journey?" he asks one, dissolved by sexual congress
"Fine, thank you," I ain for first class It really is a much nicer way to travel" I smile shyly at him "I have some news," I add nervously
"Oh?" he looks down at me as he undoes the last button, slips my blouse down my arms, and throws it on top of his discarded clothes
"I have a job"
He stills, then sratulations, Miss Steele Noill you tell me where?" he teases
"You don&039;t know?"
He shakes his head, frowning slightly
"Why would I know?"
"With your stalking capabilities, I thought you ht have " I trail off as his face falls"Anastasia, I wouldn&039;t drea in your career, unless you ask me to, of course" He looks wounded
"So you have no idea which co co it&039;s one of theood Well done" He leans forward and kisses irl When do you start?"