Page 7 (1/2)
"Only you can undo the curse," she says, and I try to watch the s, to see how she can speak without lips "The clues are everywhere We don’t have much time"
This is a dream, I remind myself A deeply messed-up dream, but a dream just the same I’ve even dreaue?"
"You seem to have it back," the white cat says, her shadowed eyes unblinking
I openinto my skin and I yelp instead
Yelp and sit up Wake up
I hear the steady patter of rain against ing I’ so hard that I have to press them underneath my body to make them stop
CHAPTER FIVE
WHEN I STAGGER DOWN to the kitchen in the s in bacon grease I have on jeans and a faded Wallingford T-shirt I don’ttie; couess, but I don’t want to get too used to it
I found a leaf stuck to h to , drenched with rain I’ve been sleepwalking again, but thelethal happened, which takes the Zacharov revenge scenario off the table So uilt that ht? It festers inside of you
Like in Poe’s "The Tell-tale Heart," which Ms Noyes made us read out loud, where the narrator hears the heart of his victi beneath the floorboards, louder and louder until he confesses, "I ad of his hideous heart!"
"I need to talk to you," I say, taking out athe coffee Thewith flecks of dust I should have probably checked for "I had a weird drea hooters"
"Uh, no" I take a sip of the coffee and wince Grandad randfather shoves a strip of bacon in his rin "Guess it would have been kind of weird if we’d had the same drea else Don’t ruin the surprise in case I have it tonight"
Grandad chuckles, but it turns into a wheeze
I look out theThere are no cats on the grass As I watch Grandad pour ketchup onto his eggs, the red liquid spreading, I think, There’s tooher, but a wet knife is in my hand and the blood is slaze
"So are you going to tell randfather sits down at the table, s as I re flashes of the ot less frequent Maybe soet
"You waiting for an engraved invitation?" Grandad asks
"The dream started with me outside in the rain I walked out to the barn, and then I woke up in uess"
"You guess?" he asks
"Lila was in my dream" I force the words out We never talk about Lila or the way the whole family protected me, after How ed me and told me that even if I had done it, then she was sure that little Zacharov bitch deserved it, and she didn’t care what anyone said, I was still her baby How there was soet it out I tried withuntil I started to bleed Until my blood washed away the other darkness
Some in It’s about time
Grandad raises an eyebrow "Maybe it would help if you talk about her Talk about killing her Get it off your chest I’ve done bad things, kid I’ after Lila’s a score and she wanted it fast
"What do you want me to say? I killed her? I know I did, even if I don’t remeet the details Maybe she thought if I didn’t reot to be so dead inside me, because normal people don’t stand over the corpse of so but a distant, horrible joy "Lila was a dreaht I don’t deserve the"
"Maybe you should come down to Carney See your uncle Armen He can still do some memory work Maybe he can help you remember"
"Uncle Armen has Alzheimer’s," I say He’s a friend of Grandad’s from when they were kids, and not really even my uncle
Grandad snorts "Nah Blowback But let’s see what that fancy doctor thinks first"
I pour more coffee into my cup A week after Lila died and Barron and Philip hid her body wherever bodies get hidden, I went to a pay phone and called Lila’s randfather explain that if anyone found out what I’d done, the whole family would pay I knew that the Zacharovs were unlikely to forget who had dug the grave and mopped up the blood and failed to turnabout Lila’s hter to coht-headed When herup Then I walked around to the back of the convenience store and puked uts out
Grandad stands up "How about you start on the upstairs bathrooet the milk," I say
"My memory’s fine," he shoots back at me as he reaches for his jacket
The floor tiles of the bathroom are cracked and torn in places, and there’s a cheap white cabinet shoved against one wall Inside are dozens and dozens of mismatched towels, some full of holes, and amber-colored plastic bottles with a few pills in each On the shelf beneath that there are jars crusted with dark liquids and tins of powder
As I clean silken balls full of baby spiders from the corners of the shower and toss out sticky,about Lila