Page 28 (1/2)

"We're not eating yet We need to go outside"

"Outside? But it's cold out there"

"Come on," he says as he pulls her toward the door

We all follow Gavin outside and stand next to Eddie I look at Nick but he shrugs, i on, either Gavin pulls a piece of paper out of his pocket and stands in front of Eddie

"I didn't write this letter, Sweetie But I was told to read it"

Eddie looks at us and sive her any, because we don't even know

It was July 4th when you came to me Independence Day You were fourteen You burst in the door and went straight to the refrigerator, telling me you needed a sprite I didn't have any sprite You told rabbed a Dr Pepper instead You freaked me out I told the caseworker there was no way I could keep you I'd never fostered a teenager before She told o the next day, that she just needed ht

I was so nervous I didn't knohat to say to a fourteen year old girl I didn't knohat kinds of things they liked, what shows they watched I was clueless But youht when it was dark outside-we heard fireworks You grabbedrass in the front yard and atched the sky You didn't shut up You told me all about the family you just came from, the family before that, and the fa, I was listening Listening to this little girl, so full of life So full and enthralled with a life that tried so hard to knock her down

Eddie gasps when she sees Joel in theof the restaurant with dozens of pink balloons He walks outside and stands beside Gavin Gavin continues reading the letter

I've never been able to give youyou how to park, I've never even taught you very ht me more than you will ever know And on this very special birthday, your eighteenth birthday-you no longer belong to the state of Michigan And as of right now, you legally no longer belong topeople that once held clai names out loud as he releases balloons one by one Eddie is crying as we all watch the balloons slowly disappear into the darkness He continues releasing thes and all 13 parents names have been read and released

He still has one pink balloon re black letters, it says DAD

Gavin folds the paper up and takes a step back as Joel walks toward Eddie

"I hope for your birthday, you’ll accept this gift," Joel says as he hands her the pink balloon "I want to be your Dad, Eddie I want to be your fas him and they cry The rest of us sloalk back inside Getty’s so they can have their od, I need a napkin," I sniff as I search for sorab some napkins off the counter when I look at Nick and Gavin They're both crying I grab a few more napkins for them as alk back to our booth

17

"If I get in’ in my name

One person dead froet locked away"

-The Avett Brothers, Murder in the City

Chapter Seventeen

I can honestly say I feel like I've rief in every aspect of my life

I have accepted my father's death I accepted his death an I've accepted my mother's fate I realize she hasn't even died yet, and that the stages of grief will once again recommence when she does But I knoon't be as hard

I've accepted living in Michigan The song I listened to on repeat at Will's house in the floor was called Weight of Lies A portion of the lyrics say,

"The weight of lies will bring you down, follow you to every town 'cause

nothing happens here that doesn't happen there"

Every ti looped, all I ever heard was the part about the lies-and how they weigh you down Tonight as I drive toward Detroit in my jeep, I knohat those words reallyto It's life You can't run to another town, another place, another state Whatever it is you’re running frooes with you It stays with you until you find out how to confront it

Whatever it is I was hoping to run back to Texas from, it would eventually an Where I'll stay And I'm okay with that

I've accepted the situation with Will I don't blame him at all for what he chose Sure, I had fantasies of hi me he doesn't need a career when he has love The reality of it is, if he would have put his feelings for me first; it would've been hard to accept that he could so easily throay the things that are the most important to him It would have said a lot less about his character So, I don't blame him, I respect him And someday when I'm ready, I'll thank him

I pull up to the club a little after eight o'clock Gavin had a surprise for Eddie so they took a detour, said they'd be here late The parking lot is unusually crowded, so I have to take a spot in the back of the building When I get out of the car, I take a deep breath and prepareto perforhts

My er in my head as I make my way to the front door "Push your boundaries Lake, that’s what they’re there for"

I can do this They're just words Repeat them and you're done It's that simple

I walk in the door a few minutes late I can tell the sac is about to perform because you could hear a pin drop I sneak in and quietly make my way to the back of the room I don't want to draw attention to myself, so I slide into an empty booth I takeher knohere I' That's when it happens; I hear hi in front of thea piece as the sacrifice

I used to love the ocean

Everything about her

Her coral reefs, her white caps, her roaring waves, the rocks they lap, her pirate legends and mermaid tails,

Treasures lost and treasures held…

And ALL

Of her fish

In the sea

Yes, I used to love the ocean,

Everything about her

The way she would sing me to sleep as I lay in my bed

then wake me with a force

That I soon ca eyes,

I'd drain her dry

If I cared enough to

I used to love the ocean,