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CHAPTER 1
Do I look okay? Ae?"
Lorelei stares htly uptight best friend, she reaches out and unbuttons the top button of the already-plunging neck ofout ofto have to hold irls contained
"There, that’s better Let’s go"
As alk side by side into Sean O’Casey’s Irish Pub, I put on e McCarty, world-renowned e McCarty--man bait My best friends Lorelei Warner and Kennedy O’Brien and I own our own private investigative firations, which was started after ere all screwed over by the men in our lives
My ex--he threay our entire life savings on his ga habit Do you want to kno I found out that Andy had a ga problem? I had just found a pair of Christian Louboutins that were TO DIE for Seriously Black slingbacks with a peep toe, silver spike eht by the toe I almost cried Actually, I did cry when all three of my credit cards were declined when I took the shoes up to the counter to pay for them Maxed out Over the liured it was just some sort of mistake until the snotty store clerk handed over the phone when she called the credit card company Six hundred thousand dollars’ worth of debt I know I have a slight proble shoes, but not a six-hundred-thousand-dollar probleot ho in theroom He racked up thatto Vegas and Atlantic City when he was supposed to be in Silicon Valley at software conferences
Lying sack of shit
But right now, I don’t have tilehusband to catch in the act A ht, so according to his file, Matt is a graphic designer and his wife, Melanie, says he’s been spending too h tih O’Casey’s
Lorelei has been doing so out his place, following hi Since his wife swears she’s seen texts from another woman on his phone, and he’s been extra secretive around her lately, it’s ti suspicious like sneaking out at lunch with his arm around a bimbo
And this is where I come in: the bimbo
"I already hate the bastard and I haven’t even met him Why do men feel the need to lie? If you’re not happy, just tell us We’ll help you pack," I complain
My heels click on the floor of the pub as Ione of my favorite bait outfits: a nice little ensemble I like to call "ray pinstripe halter vest: coether in the front with just four tiny buttons Well, three buttons now, thanks to Lorelei If I make sure not to take deep breaths, my all-natural 34Cs should stay put
"I see hi a beer," Lorelei says quietly next to aze zeroes in on our subject and I take a moment to watch him unnoticed He looks exactly like his picture in the file Black hair, short on the sides and messy on top; dark stubble around a jaw that I can’t deny is a little delicious to look at; and a pair of black, trendy glasses perched on his nose My ex wore a pair of those glasses He didn’t need glasses, but he thought they made him look cool
They didn’t
Matt is wearing a blue-and-white-striped button-doith a navy blue V-necked sweater over it with a pair of khaki dress pants Nerdy chic Super It’s like soed up Andy and stuck hiain why I picked this job instead of the easy subpoena delivery that Lorelei got?
"Wow, he looks a lot like Andy," Lorelei says, stating the obvious
"I know Don’t reht now"
Lorelei pulls a small Nikon camera out of her purse and checks the zoo up the subject until I can get a good shot of hi out with you," she tells
Right The job Fool Me Once Investigations was started because the three of us wanted to help other wo like fools when the men in their lives played the to the rescue of our fellooman scorned is e prefer I need to remember that this is just a job and not a way for h someone else All I have to do is make nice with the little cheater, chat hiet him to kiss me Piece of cake and bam, the wife is vindicated and can happily take her photos to her lawyer I’ve done it a hundred times
Oh, don’t look at h my mother seems to think I am whenever I tell her I’s before you s to show other wo will screw you over the first chance he gets
"Okay, wishover to the bar Just like always, Lorelei takes a seat at one of the booths across from the bar with a clear view of the subject We’ve done this so ot it down to a science All I have to do is say ht up with recognition I know, that makes me sound a little conceited, but I swear I’m not It’s the truth
I used to like the fact that whenever I told a guyas he reazine covers It made me feel special and wanted and beautiful Now it’s just annoying Just once it would be nice for a guy to have no idea who I auy who has no expectation that you will look
Andy liked having ar ot old He wasn’t happy just sitting at ho a movie He alanted to showAndy!
Sliding onto the bar stool next to Matt, I signal the waiter and he co over
"I’ll take a lemon-drop martini and one of whatever this handso," I tell the bartender with a wink
Matt looks up from his drink and blinks at me in surprise
Wow, he has really blue eyes Like, really blue And he sle I’ood cologne
"Oh, thanks, but I’ back down at his half-elass of beer
Ue," I tell hi my hand out in front of him