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My job is to lead

I’ve been shot; it will not be fatal There are things to be e theotten

Her naers clench and unclench as I make my way toward the L Roo these corridors are and just how many soldiers line the halls There’s no reprieve from their curious stares and their disappointment that I did not die I don’t even have to look at the how they feel onlylife

I will give no one the satisfaction of my death

"No"

I wave away the tea and coffee service for the fourth time "I do not drink caffeine, Delalieu Why do you always insist on having it served at e yourthat strange, shaky smile And I’m not entirely certain, but I think he’s just made a joke

"Why?" I reach for a slice of bread "I a y of a bean or a leaf to stay awake throughout the day"

Delalieu is no longer s

"Yes," he says "Certainly, sir" And stares down at his food I watch as his fingers push away the coffee cup

I drop the bread back onto my plate "My opinions," I say to him, quietly this time, "should not so easily break your own Stand by your convictions Forree"

"Of course, sir," he whispers He says nothing for a few seconds But then I see hiain

Delalieu

He, I think, is inally assigned to this sector by my father, and has since been ordered to reh he’s likely forty-five yearsdirectly below me I’ve known Delalieu’s face since I was a child; I used to see his that took place in the years before The Reestablishment took over

There was an endless supply of s in s, leading discussions and whispered conversations I was never allowed to be a part of Thethis world now, so when I look at Delalieu I can’t help but wonder why he never aspired to , but somehow seems content to die just as he is now He chooses to reive him opportunities to speak up; he refuses to be proher pay And while I appreciate his loyalty, his dedication unnerves me He does not seem to wish for more than what he has

I should not trust hiun to lose my mind for a lack of co but a cool distance from my soldiers, not only because they all wish to see me dead, but also because I have a responsibility as their leader to make unbiased decisions I have sentenced myself to a life of solitude, one wherein I have no peers, and no mind but my own to live in I looked to build myself as a feared leader, and I’ve succeeded; no one will question my authority or posit a contrary opinion No one will speak to ent of Sector 45 Friendship is not a thing I have ever experienced Not as a child, and not as I ao, I met the exception to this rule There has been one person who’s ever looked me directly in the eye The same person who’s spoken to er and real, raw feeling in e me, to raise her voice to me--

I squeeze my eyes shut for what feels like the tenth time today I unclench un to throb again, and I reach for the pills tucked away in ht of those within a twenty-four-hour period, sir"

I open the cap and toss threeMy ht, too tense Stretched thin

I don’t wait for the pills to dissolve I bite down on the about the foul, metallic taste that helps me focus "Tell me about Kent"

Delalieu knocks over his coffee cup

The dining aides have left the room at my request; Delalieu receives no assistance as he scra at the wall just behind hi up the minutes I’ve lost today

"Leave the coffee"

"I--yes, of course, sorry, sir--"

"Stop"

Delalieu drops the sopping napkins His hands are frozen in place, hovering over his plate

"Speak"

I watch his throat move as he ss, hesitates "We don’t know, sir," he whispers "The building should’ve been impossible to find, much less to enter It’d been bolted and rusted shut But e found it," he says, "e found it, it wasthe door had been destroyed And we’re not sure how they ed it"

I sit up "What do you mean, destroyed?"

He shakes his head "It wasvery odd, sir The door had beenh it There was only a gaping, ragged hole in the middle of the fra the table for support I’ht of it, at the possibility of what must’ve happened And I can’t help but allowher name once more, because I know itextraordinary, and I wasn’t even there to witness it

"Call for transport," I tell him "I will meet you in the Quadrant in exactly ten minutes"

"Sir?"

I’m already out the door