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"I can see why E up on him," she whispers in "

We both laugh and Maddox jerks his head in our direction The carefree sone He almost looks mad that he ever let it appear in the first place

"I’ll take Nate while you two do your chick stuff" He takes off with a giggling Nate in his arms I hear a door click in the distance, and know he one down into the basement where Beck keeps all his workout equip that we aren’t actually eating, huh?" She lets a nervous laugh bubble out, but stops when I look at her and shake my head "I didn’t think so I just knew somehow that you didn’t want to catch up"

"Coo sit out in the sunroo and follows afterht, I orried about what you wanted to talk about I could tell by the tone in your voice that soure out for the life of reen eyes look so dark when she’s worried She’s biting on her lip and fidgeting with her hands

I start at the beginning and tell her about my parents, the boys I used to date, and how all those relationships ended I tell her about how I didn’t have any real friends until the day Iher head a few ti I can tell she’s getting upset when Iup with my parents, but she kept silent

Then I tell her everything I’ve only spoken about to Dr Maxwell and Maddox about I finally reveal the secrets about her ex-husband that I have held in for so long She only lets out a few shocked gasps, her hand shooting out to hold mine when I relate how he broke into my office and beat et you out, Izzy I was just so scared of what he would do I could see it in his eyes I don’t kno I knew, but I just did I sat by and let hiaze and see the tears in her eyes, it breaksback start falling freely

"You’ve been beating yourself up this whole time, haven’t you?" I nod my head, but before I can open my mouth, she interrupts "Brandon was a sick ot his filthy hands on you, but nothing that happened duringto keep her eives her away

I pause for a second to get ready to finish aze out on the beautifully landscaped backyard I must have been silent for a while, because her whispered questionme, Dee? I know you There’s

"Yeah, there’s more" I take another breath and look back over to see her face aith pain "When he finally got done using his fist he told me that if I tried to contact you in any way, that he would kill you," I whisper on a sob Her tears are coet the rest out before she starts to cry in earnest "And then… then he took the only thing left to take fro me to shut up

"I’m sorry, so sorry I wasn’t there when you needed me, but he said he would kill you! I tried to keep my eyes on you, but I was so terrified that if I even tried to warn you, he would take you fro with her sobs, and it’s hard to tell who is crying louder at this point She grabsWe sit there, rocking together for a while, before she pulls back

"He raped you, didn’t he?" she asks a few minutes later, her voice cal violently

"Yeah, he did"

If she hadn’t have juht that she heardto process this I really am… I can’t even wrap my head around all of this, Dee! Why didn’t you tell one? Did you think I would blah that alone" She wipes her eyes with her shirt and tries to calm herself down "You’re like my sister, Dee Why couldn’t you tell me?"

"Because I didn’t kno It see back, but then, all I saas another man turned monster It wasn’t even about the rape, Izzy That was terrible, but I survived it I orried about you and ould happen if I didn’t find a way to save you"

She grabs ht that I called you, you saved my life that day and every day after I wish you had toldme with this"

We sit here both with our own pain, for a few ainst mine "You aren’t done, are you? If you were done, you wouldn’t look like that" Her eyes are wide and panicked with the unknown fear of what else I have to tell her

"I’m not done"

"Jesus, Dee" She shakes her head in disbelief "Tell ives me the last push I need

I tell her about the pain I suffered after Brandon’s final attack How his attack clicked some switch inside of htmare that he created How I had no hope in ht with depression, and concerning what the doctor has diagnosed as PTSD brought on by the attack For a second, I think I need to stop, or fib a little and downplay how bad I got et this all out in order tofor air by the tirabsinto the crook of my neck "I’m so, so sorry I’ve been so wrapped up with Axel, Nate, and life that I’ve been a terrible friend"

"No, Iz You haven’t been a terrible friend You’ve just had other priorities, and I never blamed you, not once Please, don’t think that I didn’t tell you this toit out, I will never be able to ht for my happiness now, and I couldn’t do that with this between us, even if you didn’t knoas there" I’le tear I hate seeing Izzy upset, but knowing that I’h that, and to let her kno hard the last few years have been, givesof peace that I didn’t have before I’ healed, and it makes me feel like a whole new person