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Tords

He’s dead

I couldn’t believe it, I just couldn’t June had to be lying I tried to write hi they were sorry but no solider by that name was listed in active duty When that letter came back it was then that I believed June and I shattered

It eeks later that I lost our baby

That was the day I lost all touch of reality and sunk into a deep depression filled black hole I pushed everyone ahen I lost that last piece of Ax I had left I turned to alcohol and spent asrandparents were still dealing with the loss of my mom, and either they turned a blind eye to my behavior or they just didn’t notice Either way, I was co ht ht me back to life The rest is, as they say…history

History I didn’t think I would have to deal with again

I don’t kno , re those early days By the tisince passed I pullmyself off and start off for the shower I don’t want to be weak again, and I a; to deal with this new fuck you fro the girl I used to be

Fifteento grab a quick bite to eat alone before I dive into my work I have a fe clients that I need to email back; proposals to be approved and some sites that need routine maintenance work done It is all pretty basic, but it will keeparoundfor a few hours when I hear the garage door open "Da a nice peaceful afternoon Sonore life around h, I save and close out of the progra up all the paperwork I have scattered on the kitchen table

Dee walks in, throwingaway "Hey you, how are you feeling?" Ah, I was expecting her to at least atte her cheer at ht was Hesitation and this cloud of tiht, or at least I’ there" I attempt a smile, but it feels forced I’ives a s down next to me

"I know you don’t want to talk about it, and I respect that, really I do We can figure this out later, and you knoon’t judge you at all if this is the way you want to play this But, just let me say this and it will be the end of it until you’re ready, okay?" She doesn’t wait for me to answer, she knohat I would say if she did "Here, he gaveto push, I think you should have this" She reaches into her jacket pocket and pulls out a s it over in front ofand whispers in my ear, "I won’t push, Iz, but I think you need to do so with that" A s ue

After a nice inner smack down, I finally reach out and flip the card over It shouldn’t come as a shock, I knehat I would probably find when I did, but never the less I still spit out a rapid burst of air

Holt Reid

Corps Security

7705556839

If anyone atching me, they would think I have completely lost it Every screw is loose and I a far frohter bubbles up before I can suppress it Wiping the tears fro to calm down, I finally focus back on that stupid, stupid card

Holt He will never be Holt to …hours,at his naure out exactly who Holt Axel Reid is today Is he ht that filters through ical question; we aren’t those blind by love teenagers anymore It made sense that he had hable move I made Why does he even want to talk to o that he was done withus back in each other’s paths

I stuff the card into the front pocket of my hoodie and pull my work out for the second ti to become best of buds

Dee comes back a few hours later and asks if I want to order some take out for dinner I could really care less but I tell her sure and to order whatever looks good I know if I don’t at least act nor and force me to talk I am not ready Four hours later, and two bottles of wine consuirly rooain Holt, Holt Reid I’le that comes out this time sounds just as wonky as it did earlier, but I just can’t help it How fucked up was this whole thing Holt…

Ittihtstand and slide er across the unlock screen I add his stupid new na up a new text screen and thinking what the hell, ht as well, at least this way I don’t have to look into those brilliant green eyes

Me: So, we go by Holt now, huh?

Axel ‘Holt’: Izzy?

Me: Ah, bingo…anyone else out there not know you as ‘Holt’?

Axel ‘Holt’: Plenty, Princess