Page 73 (1/2)

"Are you cold?"

To the bone She nodded and tried gingerly to sit up as he crossed the rooas fireplace With a whoosh, blue and orange fla the dark rooht

When he came back and settled in beside her, she reached up slowly, traced the outline of his lips with the tip of her finger "You first ravished me on the floor in front of a fire, remember?"

He smiled; like a blind woman, she felt his lips curve with the sensitive pad of her finger "If I re"

"And what if I wanted to ravish you now?"

He looked so scared that she wanted to laugh, but it wasn't funny "Can we?"

He took her in his ar that she'd lost soleft of her

Nothing left of her

She closed her eyes and tightened her hold around his neck

The bed see suddenly, like a sea of soft white cotton compared to the bed downstairs that had become hers

Slowly, Kate took off her robe and peeled out of her nightgown, trying not to notice hohite and sticklike her legs were Even worse was the battlefield that had been her breasts She looked ruined, like a little boy, only there were the scars

Johnny stripped out of his clothes, kicked the the covers up to their hips

Her heart was thu hard as she looked at him

"You're so beautiful," he said, and leaned forward to kiss her scars

Relief and love cracked her open inside She kissed hied already In their twenty years of e they'd reat, but this was different; they had to be so gentle She kneas terrified of breaking her bones She hardly remembered later how it had all happened, how she'd come to be on top of him; all she kneas that she needed every part of hi that she was, that she'd ever been, was irrevocably tied up with thisher, she calorious second, she hole again She bent down and kissed hi his tears

He cried out her name so loudly she silenced him with her palhed at his outburst and whispered, The kids!

But her own orgas except the pleasure of this sensation

Finally, sainst him He put an ar ti the firelight, saying nothing

Then, quietly, Kate said what had been on hertime "I can't stand to think of you alone"

"I won't ever be alone We've got three kids"

"You knohat I mean I'd understand if you and Tully--"

"Don't" He looked at her finally, and in the eyes she kneell as her own she saw a pain so deep she wanted to weep

"It was always you Just you, Katie Tully was a one-night stand, a long tio I didn't love her then and I never have Not for a second You're my heart and soul My world How can you not know that?"

She saw the truth in his face, heard it in the tremble in his voice, and she was asha "I do know that I'm just so worried about you and the kids I hate to think"

This conversation was like swih flesh and bone "I know, baby," he said finally "I know"

CHAPTER THIRTY-SEVEN

The day of the summer play dawned crisp and clear A beautiful Northwest autu event, but she was too weak to dotook effort The pain behind her eyes was constant now, like the bleating beat of an alarm clock that couldn't be turned off

And so Kate handed over her duties to Tully, who perforh ht had fallen, she was as rested as she could be and ready to face the challenge of what lay ahead

"Are you sure you're up to this?" Tully asked at six forty-five

"I'm ready Maybe you should put some makeup on ht you'd never ask And I brought you a wig to wear--if you want it"

"I'd love it I would have thought of it myself if I had any brain cells left" She reached for her oxygen mask and took a few hits

Tully left the rooled her bed up and closed her eyes "This feels like the old days"

Tully talked as she worked heron lashes Kate let herself be carried away on the tide of her friend's voice "I have a gift, you know Do you have a razor?"

Kate h Maybe she even did

"Okay," Tully finally said "Ti she'd fallen asleep, and grinned "Sorry about that"

"Don't worry about "

Kate pulled the stocking cap off her head and thecold

Tully put the wig on, positioned it, then helped Kate dress in a black wool dress with tights and boots In the wheelchair, they wrapped her in blankets, then Tully wheeled her over to the mirror "Well?"

She stared at her reflection--pale, thin face with eyes that looked huge beneath the drawn-on eyebrows, brightly blond shoulder-length hair, perfectly red lips "Great," she said, hoping she sounded honest

"Good," Tully said "Let's round the troops up and go"

A half an hour later, they pulled up to the auditorium They were so early that no other cars were yet in the parking lot