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"Yes," was all she could say

She rolled onto her side, slid her naked leg over him "Is it always like that?"

When he turned to her, she saw so in his blue eyes that confused her: fear

"No, Katie," he said after a long time "It's not"

Kate woke in Johnny's arms They both lay on their backs, with the sheets puddled around their hips She stared up at the planked ceiling, feeling the heavy, unfaht of his hand between her naked breasts

Dawn's pale glow slanted through the open , collecting in a buttery sainst the pilings echoed the slow and steady beat of her heart

She didn't knohat she was supposed to do no she was supposed to act Froift They'd ht, the last tio They'd kissed, they'd made omelettes and eaten in front of the fire, they'd talked about their families and their job and their dreams Johnny had even told a series of extremely stupid jokes

What they hadn't talked about was tomorrow, and it was here now, as much a presence between the

She was glad she'd waited to uy was unfashionable these days Everything about last night had rocked her world, just as the poets predicted

But what if Johnny didn't think she was the right girl? He hadn't said he loved her--of course he hadn't--and without those words, hoas a woman to put passion in context?

Was she supposed to get dressed and sneak out and pretend it never happened? Or should she go downstairs andand not an ending?

When she felt hi," he said in a gravelly voice

She didn't kno to play coy or act indifferent She'd loved hi to pretend otherwise What o their separate ways "TellI don't know about you"

He stroked her upper arm "Hly easy to picture hi, skinny boy, with his hair slicked back fro carefully up the aisle The ile "Myabout you"

"I'eekess Star Wars, Star Trek, Dune I love theed you for a ro that ?"

"You always go right for deep water, don't you?" He sighed "I think you've figured it out anyway El Salvador I went down there like soht on the truth And then I saas happening"

She said nothing, just kissed the curl of his shoulder

"My folks had hidden so ht I was prepared, but you can't be It's blood and death and body parts being blown off It's dead kids in the street and boys with ot captured" His voice faded away; he cleared his throat and reinforced it "I don't knohy they let me live, but they did Lucky s and ran ho to be ashamed of"

"I ran like a coward And I failed So now you know it all, why I'es how I feel about you?"

It was a moment before he said, "We need to take this slow, Katie"

"I know" She rolled over, so that she was pressed against hi about his face and how he looked first thing in the rown in their sleeping hours and thought: Already, changes

He tucked the hair behind her ear "I don't want to hurt you"

She wanted to say simply, Then don't, but this wasn't a time for simple answers or pretense Honestyhurt if you will," she said evenly

A hint of a ses of his mouth, but she didn't see it in his eyes In fact, he looked erous"

She didn't understand "Me? You erous"

"I do"

"Why?"

He didn't answer; instead, he leaned forward just enough to kiss her She closed her eyes, waiting for it She wasn't sure, but maybe, just before his lips touched hers, he said, "Because you're the kind of girl a guy could fall in love with"

He didn't sound particularly happy as he said it

Outside her front door, Kate paused Only ht spent in Johnny's arms, but now she was back in the real world, where she'd just slept with a man her best friend had slept with first

What would Tully say?

She opened the door and went inside On this gray, rainy ly quiet She tossed her purse on the kitchen table and made herself a cup of tea

"Where the hell have you been?"

She turned, flinched

Tully stood there, her hair dripping earing nothing but a towel "I al the suit fro sht with sohed "And I thought you were going to die a virgin" She grabbed Kate's ared her over to the sofa "Talk"

Kate stared at her best friend, wishing she'd coht, planning Tully could ruin it all with a word, a look He's mine, her friend could say, and ould Kate do?

"Talk," Tully said again, bu her

Kate took a deep breath "I'm in love"

"Whoa there, Penelope Pitstop Love? After one night?"

It was now or never, and though never sounded good, there was no point in putting off the inevitable "No," she said "I've loved him for years"

"Who?"