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She went tense; she couldn&039;t help it Even though it was Butch and she loved hi nature of it, swamped her Three hundred years and it had suddenly come down to here and now

For some stupid reason, tears welled

"Baby, we really don&039;t have to do this" His thuoing to get off

"I don&039;t want to stop" She grabbed on to the small of his back "No¡ªButch, wait I want this I truly do"

He closed his eyes Then dropped his head into her neck and worked his ar to the side, he hugged her into his hard body and they stayed like that for a long tiht positioned so she could breathe, his arousal a hot, branding length on her thigh She began to wonder if he was going to do anything at all

Just as she was about to ask, he shifted and his hips fell solidly between her legs again

He kissed her, a deep, drugging full- under hiet closer to him

And then it happened He moved over a little to the left, and she felt his erection at her core, all hard and smooth There was a broad, satin stroke and then so about exactly as pushing at her and where it wanted to go

Butch sed hard enough for her to hear it and sweat broke out across his shoulders until it ran down his spine As the pressure between her legs intensified, his breathing deepened until he was groaning on every exhale When she winced in earnest, he abruptly backed off

"What&039;s wrong?" she asked

"You&039;re very tight"

"Well, you&039;re very big"

He laughed in a burst "Nicest things you say the nicest things"

"Are you stopping?"

"Not unless you wantfrom her, his body tensed up and the head of hiain His hand came up next to her face and he tucked her hair behind her ear

"If you can, try and relax, Marissa It&039;ll go easier for you" He started a rocking entle to and fro Except each tie in a fraction, her body resisted

"You okay?" he said through gritted teeth

She nodded even though she tree, especially as they weren&039;t ress¡ª

With a sudden slide he was in, slipping past soer had found As she stiffened, Butch groaned and dropped his face into the pillow next to her head

She smiled uneasily, the fullness in her unexpected "I¡ªah, I feel like I should be asking whether you&039;re all right"

"Are you kidding? I think I&039; "But I hate the idea of hurting you"

"So let&039;s get that part behind us"

She felt rather than saw his nod "I love you"

With a quick jerk, he drew back his hips and sliced forward

The pain was raw and fresh and she gasped, shoving against his shoulders to keep hi under his, trying to find a way out or at the very least to get some distance

Butch lifted his torso off her, and their bellies brushed while they both breathed hard With his heavy cross swinging between them, she let out a raw curse The pressure before had been mere discomfort This wasn&039;t This hurt

And she felt so invaded by him, taken over God, that female chatter she&039;d overheard about hoas all lock-and-key wonderful, how the first ti was so easy¡ªnone of that was true for her

Panic swelled What if she really was broken on the inside? Was this the defect the lymera had sensed? What if¡ª

"Marissa?"

¡ªshe couldn&039;t get through it at all? What if every time it hurt like this? Oh, Jesus Butch was veryfor other¡ª

"Marissa, look at ed her eyes to his face, but all she could pay attention to was the voice in her head Oh, Jesus, it wasn&039;t supposed to hurt this badly, was it? Oh, Jesus she was defective

"How you doing?" he said roughly "Talk to me Don&039;t keep it inside"

"What if I can&039;t stand it?" she blurted

His expression went utterly bland, becoine many wo your virginity is a lie"

Or maybe it wasn&039;t Maybe she was the problem

The word defect raced around her head even faster, even louder

"Marissa?"

"I wanted it to be beautiful," she said with despair

There was a horrible silence during which all she kneas the strain of his erection in her body Then Butch said, "I&039;m sorry you&039;re disappointed But not all that surprised"

He started to pull out, and that hen so sensation caused a tingle to go through her

"Wait" She grabbed on to his hips "That&039;s not all there is to it, right?"

"Pretty h"

"Oh but you haven&039;t finished¡ª"

"I don&039;t need to anymore"

When his erection slipped free of her, she felt curiously erew instantly cold As he flipped a coh for an instant The shaft et and had softened

He settled on his back next to her, resting both forearms over his face

God what a ht her breath, she wanted to ask hi, but she knehat he would say The "no" was in the stiffness of his body

While they lay side by side, she felt like she should say so "Butch¡ª"

"I&039;o to sleep, okay?" He rolled away, punched a pillow, and exhaled in a long, uneven breath