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There’s the word froain-- choose -- but I nod because I don’t want to set her off again "So what are you going to do?"

She looks away, biting her lip, and I can tell she’s debating whether or not to trust ht"

"What?" Zoom The fear floods back in

She rushes on "It’s so, a few bands playing out by the border in Stroudwater, on one of the farms"

"You can’t be serious You’re not--you’re not actually going, right? You’re not even thinking about it"

"It’s safe, okay? I pro, Lena, I swear you’d be into it if you looked

They’re hidden Links, usually, eovernment stuff, but I don’t know, soht, you know?

They don’t belong"

I grasp at a single word "Safe? How can it be safe? That guy you met--the censor--his whole job is to track down people who are stupid enough to post these things--"

"They’re not stupid, they’re incredibly sulators and patrols and the youth guard and curfew and segregation and just about everything else that makes this one of the worst ideas--"

"Fine" Hana raises her arhs The noise is so loud it makes me jump "Fine So it’s a bad idea So it’s risky You knohat? I don’t care"

For a second there’s silence We’re glaring at each other, and the air between us feels charged and dangerous, a thin electrical coil, ready to explode

"What about

"You’re welco Brook Far You know-- fun

The stuff we’re supposed to be having, before they cut out half of our brain"

I ignore the last part of her cootten, we have other plans for tonight Have had plans for tonight for, oh, the past fifteen years"

"Yeah, well, things change" She turns her back to me, but I feel like she’s reached out and punchedup This ti I go over to her bed and start gathering uphas spilled over on its side, and now her cou these back intoback the tears "Go ahead Do whatever you want tonight I don’t care"

Maybe Hana feels bad, because her voice softens a little bit "Seriously, Lena You should think about coet in any trouble, I promise"

"You can’t pro"You don’t know that

You can’t be positive " "And you can’t go on being so scared all the time"

That’s it: That does it I whirl around, furious, so inside of ht to be scared And if you’re not scared it’s just because you have the perfect little life, and the perfect little fa is perfect, perfect, perfect You don’t see You don’t know"

"Perfect? That’s what you think? You think er

I’m tempted to move away from her but force ain she lets out a barking laugh, a quick explosion

"So you think this is it, huh? As good as it gets?" She turns a full circle, ar the roo

Her question startles, Lena" She shakes her head "Listen, I’ize I know you have your reasons for being scared What happened to yourht, electric

"But you can’t go on blao"

Anger ssMy ainst randoet Mom I love you And now I see that Hana is a snake--has been waiting a long ti to squiro, and bite