Page 25 (1/2)

She broke off, inhaling deeply as if to coaze and stared directly into his, her eyes earnest and aith vulnerability

"Why would you even want to sleep with me?" she whispered "Why would you wantthis?" She swept her hand down her body and around, clearly indicating her position Her sube, requires a lot of trust on my part But it has to involve your trust as well Besides the fact that I can’t iine why you’d want to have sex with a woive nant?"

His fingers tightened at her shoulders and then he forced hirip He’d bruise her, and he never wanted to hurt her He took his hands away, not trusting hihter

She looked hurt at his withdrawal and he let out a groan He could do nothing right where she was concerned Every touch, every word out of hisit up and this was too i

For the first time in his life, he was scared Because he knew if he didn’t handle this just right, he’d lose her And that wasn’t an option No matter what it took, no matter what he had to do, she had to be part of his life

Dear God, he was precariously close to begging, and he’d never begged for anything

He cleared his throat and rocked back on his heels, his throat clogged with everything he needed to say

Then he rose, extending his hand down to her She glanced at hin of her trust Trust he hadn’t been able to return or e of the bed and pulled her naked body into his hold, cradling her, positioning her on his lap so she’d be near hi him

He rested his chin atop her slim shoulder and then turned hisher scent and savoring it

"I’aze directed at the far wall He reached up, slid his finger underneath her chin and gently redirected her gaze to hiht terrible things It wasn’t fair to you I was afraid, Bethany Terrified," he amended "I reacted badly This is new territory for me I’ve never been soI’ve never been so fucked up over a woman before I’m used to control You know this about otten hints For the space of those few hours, I had none I couldn’t protect you I had no control over what happened to you It freaked me the hell out And I took that out on you"

"I understand," she said softly

He shook his head "No You don’t And you shouldn’t have to You explained what happened, and while I don’t agree hat you did, I had no excuse for the things I accused you of I have a teet to know that as well I’ beyond my control But what you need to understand is that I’ll never hurt you Or at least I’ll try very hard not to Physically, it isn’t ever going to happen But I’ll say shit because I’uarantee it’s never going to happen again But you need to know ahead of ti a lot, but I need for you to be able to ignoreshit that hurts you I’ll try like hell not to do it, but I know me My friends know me I’ve been a dick to the people I care most about You Gabe Ash My own sister But I know it hurts you You aren’t used to s I say in the heat of the moment But you will knowanywhere, and what’s between us is only going to grow stronger I need you to believe that I need you to want it as much as I want it because that’ll tell me that you’ll stick around and weather it with me"

Her eyes rounded in shock Her expression was one of utter a deep, and he doubted she even realized it

Her lips parted and he waited as she collected her thoughts He could see her processing all he’d said Hell, he wasn’t even sure he’d processed it yet This spilling his guts was not soular basis Or ever, for that oddamn vulnerable in his life and he didn’t like it one bit

He felt as though so out in front of her

"So what do you want from me?" she whispered "I ? A temporary submissive? A charity case? You have to understand that I’m scared too I don’t knohat you want from me You’ve done so much for me but I’m afraid to embrace it because all I can think is that if you toss o back to my life I’d rather never have known you and been able to savor our relationship than to suddenly be stripped bare and return to the existence I’ve led until now

"I’ve lived it most of my life Even the parts of my life when I wasn’t on the streets weren’t happy years They were years of survival, of hoping for the best and usually not getting it I’m okay with that life It’s all I’ve ever known But you’ve shown me a different life"

Her voice cracked and the pain hit Jace in the chest, nearly suffocating him He wanted to pull her into his ar but he knew she needed to say this They both needed it so they could forge ahead

Tears filled her eyes and she looked so afraid that it gutted his could be," she whispered "And I want it, Jace I shouldn’t want it I shouldn’t even dare to drea so beautiful could happen toto take it from me, if this is only temporary, some amusement for you, then I don’t want it because it will kill o back to my life"

Tears slipped silently down her cheeks To his shock, he found his own eyes burned, as if someone had thrown sand in his face

"And I know it sounds crazy foryou this We’ve known each other for such a short time And it’s not fair for o back to where I cas could be Of drea hoould be to be with a ue that I can’t even wrap my brain around it Don’t lie to me I need to know if that’s all this is to you Just soive o if I’ll never er able to listen to the aching pain in her voice, he crushed her to hiainst his chest

"God, Bethany Jesus, baby, I don’t even knohere to begin"

"With the truth," she said against his neck