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Lizzie asks et back inside first I need to get the food inside then shut the door and lock the bloody thing behind ht?&039; she asks again &039;Why were you so long?&039;

I run back to the car and grab the last few odds and ends that have fallen out of the rapidly disintegrating cardboard box I push past her and throw the stuff into the kitchen

&039;Dad,&039; Ed whines, &039;can we have so&039;

I ignore all of the sure my home and runt angrily at Ellis who is standing right in the h

&039;What&039;s wrong?&039; Lizzie asks again from the other side of the kitchen table When I don&039;t answer she starts to unpack soht hoet this for?&039; she says, holding up a jar of honey &039;None of us likes honey&039;

All of the tension and fear that&039;s been building up insideto the surface It&039;s no-one&039;s fault, I just can&039;t help myself

&039;I know no-one likes it,&039; I shout, &039;no-one likes any of this fucking stuff but it&039;s all I could get You should go out there and see what it&039;s like It&039;sapart so don&039;t start having a go atwell likes honey&039;

Liz looks like I&039;ve punched her in the face She&039;s gone white with shock The kids are all in the kitchen with us now, staring at us both ide, frightened eyes

&039;I just&039; she starts to say

&039;I&039; the best I can for us here,&039; I screa on the streets I&039;ve just watched a kid beating soer to help her,madness and I don&039;t knohat to do any and picking holes in what I&039;ve done when I feel like I&039;ve just risked my damn neck for you lot I don&039;t askand&039;

I stop shouting Liz is treainst the cooker, and she&039;s shaking with fear What the hell is wrong with her? I take a single step around the table to get closer to her and she recoils She slides further away fro back towards the door And then I realise what&039;s wrong Jesus, she thinks I&039;ve changed She thinks I&039;m one of them She thinks I&039;m a Hater

&039;No, don&039;t&039; I start to say, trying to ain, &039;Please, Lizzie&039;

She&039;s starting to sob Her legs look like they&039;re about to give way Don&039;t collapse on me, Liz, please don&039;t

&039;Stay back,&039; she says, her voice barely audible &039;Don&039;t come any closer&039;

I try to speak but I can&039;t get the words out Don&039;t do this to me I shuffle nearer

&039;Stay back!&039; she screa the wall away from me She reaches the door and starts to push the kids out of the kitchen She doesn&039;t take her eyes off me

&039;No, Liz,&039; I say, desperate to ed Please believe me I&039;m sorry I shouted I didn&039;taway but she&039;s still unsure I can see it in her eyes

&039;If you&039;re one of them I&039;ll&039;

&039;I&039;m not, Lizzie, I&039;one for you by noouldn&039;t I?&039; I cry I don&039;t knohat else to say I&039; to panic but I don&039;t want her to see &039;Please, I&039;ry but I&039;m calm now, aren&039;t I? Please&039;

I can see that she&039;s thinking hard about what I&039;ve just said The children are peering around the door, trying to see what&039;s happening Inside I&039; but I force myself to stay level and not shout My head is filled with all kinds of dark, terrifying thoughts I just got angry, that&039;s all I&039;m not a Hater, am I?

&039;Okay,&039; she eventually ain I&039;ll&039;

&039;I won&039;t,&039; I interrupt &039;I forgot myself I didn&039;t think&039;

I still don&039;t know if she believesat me out of the corner of her eye and it&039;s like she&039;s waiting for me to attack her I&039;d never hurt her I&039;m relieved when sheit Every couple of seconds she looks up Every time I move I see her catch her breath and stop

&039;So what happened out there?&039; she asks, finally coain I don&039;t knohere to start Between us we try and feed the kids while I explain about the queues at the supermarket and what I saw at O&039;Shea&039;s I tell her about the looting and about the girl attacking the wos have suddenly got

Ellis is snapping at &039;s wrong That&039;s good, I decide I&039; atroos it over I switch on the TV but stop before I put the DVD in the o,&039; Liz says &039;Couldn&039;t stand watching any ain and again&039;

I sit cross-legged in front of the television and stare at the pictures that flash in front of s are really bad I&039;ve seen a lot of bizarre stuff over the last few days but what I&039; now scares the hell out of me Now I fully realise how dire and serious the situation has quickly becoone There are no more reports and no more presenters All we&039;re left with is a continually repeated public inforain

&039;Stay in your ho e and a series of siain &039;Stay with your family Stay away from people you don&039;t know&039;