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SATURDAY

Half past six and the alarroan I reach out and fumble around in the darkness to switch it off I have to think for a et up? I&039;ot to cancel the alarh yesterday and last night I can reinto ht and running away froht? Doesn&039;t matter now All that&039;s iet up and go to work

I roll over onto my side and put my arm around Lizzie She seemed happier yesterday than she has been for a while It did us both good to get out and spend soether Shaot back to the flat I had to drive Harry home After that we opened a couple of cans of beer and sat in front of the TV watching a du our brains

I shuffle a little closer to Liz and then wait for her to react When she doesn&039;t respond I ainst her We never seeone are the times e could be free and jump into bed at the drop of a hat These days there&039;s always so kids has changed everything I wish I&039;d been allowed to borrow someone else&039;s for a while before we had our own I never appreciated just howchildren can screw up your previously simple and uncomplicated life

I can feel Lizzie&039;s skin through the cloth of her pyjamas She feels beautifully soft and warht take a chance and try and slip entle enough, aAt this tih, she&039;s more likely to kick me than caress me But I can remember a time a couple of weeks back ere both in the kitchen She&039;d brushed up againstup I stopped and turned around and she just looked at me like she does sorabbed her et hands and pushed her back onto the table She took off her top and

&039;I want my breakfast, Daddy,&039; Ellis pipes up from somewhere in the darkness at the side of the bed Christ, she scared me half to death I had no idea she was there My suddenly se

&039;It&039;s too early,&039; I mumble &039;Go back to bed&039;

&039;I&039;ry, Daddy,&039; she says, undeterred

&039;In a bit&039;

&039;I&039;ry now I can&039;t wait&039;

&039;Later&039;

&039;Now,&039; she demands with more force and insistence in her voice than I would ever have expected fro anywhere I&039;ll have to try a different tack

&039;Why don&039;t you get into bed with Muest hopefully, quickly giving up all thoughts of sex &039;We&039;ll get up and get your breakfast in a few minutes&039; An hour or so with Ellis in the bed see up now I expect a little resistance but, to s herself up onto the bed, steps over les between Lizzie and I Christ her feet are cold Lizzie angrily ible when they touch her

Thirty seconds of silence and she starts on ain

&039;I want toast please, Daddy,&039; she says I have to give her her due, shebut at least she&039;s polite

&039;In a rabbing back so my body to avoid contact with her icy feet &039;Let&039;s just stay in bed for a little longer, shall we?&039;

She agrees but she talks And she talks And she keeps talking I screw my eyes shut and pull the duvet over ed to last another twentyup I&039; for the kettle to boil We&039;re both dressed and Ellis has had her breakfast but she&039;s still talking non-stop about nothing in particular Lizzie&039;s still in bed She could sleep through anything Wish I could

It&039;s freezing cold in here This flat is impossible to heat I think it&039;s so cold because the rest of the building is virtually eround floor and all the warenerates just rises up and disappears into the eet us moved upstairs to see if that rab my drink and a bowl of cereal and sit down in front of the TV There&039;s nothing on worth watching; crappy cartoons, cookery and lifestyle progra kids shows are all I can find I settle on the news but even the headlines are boring this(an outbreak of violence in the capital, a sex scandal involving a politician and his nephew, e and a celebrity death) I&039;ll wait for the sports headlines They&039;re usually on just before the hour

Christ, all the kids are out of bed now Why do they have to get up so early? We have to drag them out of their beds when it&039;s a school day They&039;ve only been up for a couple ofover so I close my eyes and wait for them to start on me It&039;s only a matter of time

&039;I want to watch Channel 22,&039; Ed says as he storms into the room Does his entire life revolve around TV?

&039;I&039; this,&039; I answer quickly, annoyed that I&039;ve been disturbed

&039;With your eyes shut?&039; he sneers in an irritating tone which makes me want to slap him

&039;Yes, withto watch so&039;

&039;I really need to watch Channel 22, Dad,&039; he whines

&039;Watch it in your rooht Ed a TV last Christ

&039;I can&039;t get Channel 22 in there&039;

&039;Sorry, son, I&039; this You can turn over when it&039;s finished&039;

&039;That&039;s not fair,&039; he yells at rammes&039;

Little shit He seems to spend all of his tiet a turn? It&039;s my TV and I can watch what I like, when I like I don&039;t knohy but I find raht year old son

&039;You&039;re alatching TV It&039;s all I ever see you do&039;

&039;No it isn&039;t It&039;s not fair, you never let me watch what I want&039;

I can hear the sports bulletin the directly between me and the TV screen