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They call it falling in love because it’s less like stepping andis the part where you’re still trying to reht in, head first With Eht it all the way down, and now, I’ve lost

Eood idea tonight

She didn’t answer for severalwhich I called myself all sorts of idiot, because that was an open invitation, as was the progressively unreserved look in her eyes all evening I only wanted to be sure of her feelings, notand everything to do with how ht…after the alcohol…i want you Trust me

Emma: I kind of feel like a hussy now

Me: NO, that isn’t what i ht, no drinking, and i can be good

Earitas I would have practiced my just say no To alcohol that is :(

Me: God how do you e fro you to hell

Emma: I want you to

Me: OMG es Three rings Please don’t go to voice "Graham, I’m sorry, really, I--"

"No, please don’t be sorry That’s why I’ you" I lay back onbut not gone "Don’t be sorry, Emma" My voice was als I said I wanted to do to you?" A few of our calls and Skype conversations over the past couple of weeks had reduced both of us to mush

Her reply was an exhalation of a pant "Yes"

"None of that has changed Increased,quite tame, in fact"

"Oh, God I’m not even sure what that--what thatback on her bed exactly as I was ona bit"

"But you’re going back to New York"

Her sulky toneback to LA in three weeks"

Her sigh was faint Not relieved, or exasperated Just… accepting "Okay," she said, sounding so et her way and she knows she isn’t going to

"I just don’t want to take advantage of you, or push you--" Lies, lies, lies--I wanted her so bad I could conjure up her scent, iertips

"But Graharowl--so appropriate to the feral hunger coursing throughto let you If you still want to"

"I will"

At 5:30 am, we meet in the lobby--which is deserted except for a bored desk clerk who gives us a disinterested once-over Flashback to ourout to run I re in the lobby, or getting there first and waiting for her, looking up at the soft chi her to the ground floor I loved those s

I hand her a there to slip my arms around her and kiss her "Ready?" I ask, and she nods Tossing the backpack onto one shoulder, I take her hand This is a risk, if only to cross the lobby I don’t want her mortified over stories of multiple hookups like she was in Austin, so we have to reet that, but it still sucks "I packed water, bagels and a blanket I figured thisthe sunrise and less about exercise"

Her hand squeezes mine "Sounds perfect"

The Jeep is ideal for the earlydrive and the cool weather but not conducive to quiet conversation We have to yell over the road noise to hear each other Falling silent after a few minutes, we just hold hands and watch the street lahten I spent an hour on the Internet last night,sure of the route to Griffith and the trail to take once we get there The sun is already a half-orb above the horizon by the tiet to the spot I ether, we sip the coffee and watch what’s left of the sunrise Perhaps I should say she watches it while I watch her I’ve seldom been this close to her and allowedher in--all the seee of a webcam never revealed the fine blondish hairs at her temple, and the darkness of her bed hides the freckle behind her ear and the blush across her cheeks when she realizes I’ her