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"I don’t," I answered shortly "But she is"

"What hold has she over you besides that?"

I stared at her "What hold?" I coughed again, near laughter, incredulous "Isn’t that enough? You’re not blind, Goewin"

"But you don’t want to do this!"

"How could you knohat I want?" I said "Under her orders I can take vengeance on your beautiful brother and let the blae for what?" Neither of us spoke for a few moments At last Goewin ventured, "Then you’d torture Lleu and turn over what’s left to her? That would please her as much as if she did it herself, wouldn’t it? Either way you are seduced--"

"No!" I burst out, so violently that Agravain stirred in his sleep My fingers had gone taut and white around the siven me "I followthis?" Goewin pressed

I coughed and pushed led Goewin took the cup from me and watched me in apprehension I said, "You of anyone should understand"

"I understand your mother," she said unexpectedly "I understand her all too well I live in constant fear that I will be kept prisoner as she is, because I aerous and powerful, and because I am a woman I would not betray Lleu even if { Llstant f I wanted to; he is ainst such a fate But you, Medraut, you have been offered the regency of his kingdom, you have power in your hand So why?"

I drew h I were touching so beautiful and delicate, an exotic flower, a piece of old silk, the skeleton of a leaf "For a word ForI want Artos to say I want him to admit, before all, that it is his own iniquity that keeps ship That the sha above Lleu’s still face, and then went on speaking as though to h she were not there "And I want Lleu to be afraid of me, to know and adain, lost I did not knohat I wanted "Lleu’s grown so confident and cruel"

"He’s not cruel!" Goewin said

"He is," I said "He is ever conscious of his beauty, his power And he never quite stops sneering at ht end by killing him," I finished bitterly "I would do it if I had a reason, if I were given the command He would deserve it"

"He would not You fret like a jealous child," Goehispered roughly "I aship as Lleu is Take o"

"I couldn’t take you," I said slowly "I aht do to you"

"What could be ht do to Lleu?" she asked

I looked at her hard and straight, perplexed, unable to believe her so naive Then I took her face between my fevered palms and held her close, so that we must look directly at one another My hands moved down her throat, across her shoulders, until at last they were cupped gently beneath her breasts; and then she knehat I ht do to her "I am your sister," she said

"You see how it happens," I said, and let her go

She sat still for a h in prayer Then she carefully set the horn cup on the floor away from us, and moved back to her place between Lleu and the cave wall She lay on her back with her eyes closed and said in an icy voice, "If you don’t bring Lleu back alive and unharmed I’ll kill you, I swear it, surely, I will find a way to kill you"

"I fear you as little as you fear me," I whispered

XII

Peak and Forest

MORNING, NOW LLEU WOKE up and was sick I began to help him dress, but he shrank from the touch of , barked out, "Let hiave Lleu his dry shirt and jacket and then dreay Afterward he crouched dejectedly next to the fire with his head in his hands, not yet able to eat or to stand Goewin said to ht what quarry you will bring away as proof of this week’s hunting?"

The young lion raised his head with an effort and answered in quiet, "Has he not?"

I took Goewin outside to speak to her alone I wanted to be certain she knew her wa ~;

"Why would he wait," Goewin asked, "once he knohat you intend?"

"He won’t know that," I said "I will not follow the road I cannot risk a direct route"