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"That’s wonderful! You need a nice girl to settle doith You are too special and have tooit around all over town, like I know you and your friends like to do"

I lifted an eyebrow and rolled the Pabst Blue Ribbon can between uys like to do, Ma?"

"I was young once, Jet I know the allure of a handso er, and I can only iine the kind of trouble you find yourselves in now that you are all grown and independent Tell , if you couldn’t remember to mention to me that you’ve been back in town for a while"

I could hear the accusation in her tone She knehy I didn’t come around much, didn’t stay in touch Yet she couldn’t stop herself fro of the beer and looked at her with a lopsided grin

"She’s different--smart, ambitious, and driven She’s different from what I’m used to I like her, a lot actually"

I sawtime, there was an emotion in theood You need someone who is as ambitious and as talented as you are"

I wasn’t sure what it was going to end up being so I just stayed silent and finished the beer and got up to toss it in the trash I crossed ave her a level, serious look as I decided to change the subject from my sex life

"Ma, did you know the old man hit me up to send him back out on the road with soht that had filtered in her hazy gaze at ood news died It was replaced with the flat look of loneliness and the acknowledgment that she only existed to him as a doormat and place filler, while he went out and lived his life without her She twisted her hands together and looked down at the table

"You father is an old o back out on the road with a bunch of young kids? What purpose would that serve?"

I raked ue to keep fro at her that there was no purpose other than his indulgent, self-centered way of living But that kind of attack never got h ainst the back of my front teeth

"Mo that served a purpose? He straight up toldto come home and take it out on you How can you just sit back and let him do that to you? How can you let his rapped out a fast beat on the counter while I waited for her to answer me For years, I had waited for her to see that I could take care of her and that she didn’t need to subject herself to his whihtless behavior I couldn’t stand that she just told me over and over that she loved hih I hadn’t willingly been in the saer

She wouldn’t look at me and her voice was barely a whisper when she replied, "You just don’t understand how it is with us, Jet You never did"

I pushed off the counter and walked to where she was actually folding in on herself in front of me I put a hand on her shoulder and squatted down so that she had no choice but to aze "Ma, don’t you think the problem is that I understand it too well? You know you can do better than him, better than this You always could"

I saw her bottoer that lived in my chest I hated that every tihtas fast as she could away from this place, and yet she stayed rooted so firet her out The roots were planted too deep

"If you canhim back out on the road, maybe you should It’s not like he really asks that much fro beside her and felt a white hot blaze shoot down my neck I wanted to shake her I wanted to shove h the closest wall I wanted to stor side of the interstate and never look back What I did instead was close my eyes, bend, and kiss her on the top of her head

"We’ll see, Ma I have to ith these guys I don’t know that I want to ask theood to see you Take care of yourself"

I was going to go before I did sorabbedclocks all over my skin Her eyes were so sad when she looked up atyour girl by I would love to meet her"

This was the last place on earth I wanted to bring Ayden, but I forced out sorin "Sure, Ma,that"

Ayden was the opposite of this woman I loved, in soand so independent that she would never let another person dictate the direction her life or actions would take, or devalue her worth I hated the idea that Ayden would see my broken-down mother and wonder why I hadn’t doneto her in the first place Those very questions pickedat my mother now, I remembered every time she had chosen this life and that asshole over uards I had put into place to protect e that lived inside , and Me out of o and wasted no ti down the front steps I felt like I was not only running away fro that had ever happened in that house Nash’s tattooed head was staring back at me from the face of my phone, so when I poked at it to answer the call I didn’t bother to fake a cheery greeting

" ’Sup, dude?"

"Where are you?"