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"No" Now that thewords She caught a glimpse of her reflection in the silvery side of the napkin holder White cardigan, white face, hectic flush in her cheeks She looked like she had a fever She felt a little like it too "I’ve been wanting to talk to you for the past few days--"

"You could have fooled me" His voice was unnaturally sharp "Every tiured you were avoiding ain"

"I wasn’t" It seemed to her that there were vast ah the booth wasn’t that big and they weren’t sitting that far apart "I did want to talk to you I’ve been thinking about you all the time"

He made a noise of surprise and held his hand out across the table She took it, a wave of relief breaking over her "I’ve been thinking about you, too"

His grip ar, and she remembered how she’d taken the bloody shard of the portal out of his hand at Renwick’s – the only thing that was left of his old life – and how he’d pulled her into his arms "I really was sick," she said "I swear I almost died back there on the ship, you know"

He let her hand go, but he was staring at her, almost as if he meant to memorize her face "I know," he said "Every time you almost die, I almost die myself"

His words made her heart rattle in her chest as if she’d sed a mouthful of caffeine "Jace I came to tell you that--"

"Wait Let me talk first" He held his hands up as if to ward off her next words "Before you say anything, I wanted to apologize to you"

"Apologize? For what?"

"For not listening to you" He raked his hair back with both hands and she noticed a little scar, a tiny silver line, on the side of his throat It hadn’t been there before "You kept telling me that I couldn’t have what I wanted fro at you and not listening to you at all I just wanted you and I didn’t care what anybody else had to say about it Not even you"

Her , Kaelie was back, with Jace’s fries and a number of plates for Clary Clary stared down at what she’d ordered A green er steak, and a plate of chocolate-dipped crickets Not that it mattered; her sto "Jace," she said, as soon as the waitress was gone "You didn’t do anything wrong You--"

"No Letdown at his fries as if they held the secrets of the universe "Clary, I have to say it now or--or I won’t say it" His words tuht I’d lost htwoods I thought they’d finished withleft in my world but you I--I was crazy with loss and I took it out on you and I’ht"

"No I was stupid I was cruel to you--"

"You had every right to be" He raised his eyes to look at her and she was suddenly and strangely re when the wind came up and bleay the castle she had made Her mother had told her she could make another one if she liked, but it hadn’t stopped her crying because what she had thought was permanent was not permanent after all, but only made out of sand that vanished at the touch of wind or water "What you said was true We don’t live or love in a vacuum There are people around us who care about us ould be hurt, ht want to feel To be that selfish, it wouldlike Valentine"

He spoke his father’s na in her face