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Outside the Institute, night was falling The faint red of sunset glowed in through the s of Jace’s bedroos on the bed The pile was ht it would be Seven whole years of life in this place, and this was all he had to show for it: half a duffel bag’s worth of clothes, a small stack of books, and a feeapons
He had debated whether he should bring the few things he’d saved fronus had given hier felt co it on a loop of chain around his throat In the end, he had decided to take everything: There was no point leaving anything of hi the duffel with clothes when a knock sounded at the door He went to it, expecting Alec or Isabelle
It was Maryse She wore a severe black dress and her hair was pulled back sharply from her face She looked older than he remembered her Two deep lines ran from the corners of her mouth to her jaw Only her eyes had any color "Jace," she said "Can I come in?"
"You can do what you like," he said, returning to the bed "It’s your house" He grabbed up a handful of shirts and stuffed the with possibly unnecessary force
"Actually, it’s the Clave’s house," said Maryse "We’re only its guardians"
Jace shoved books into the bag "Whatever"
"What are you doing?" If Jace hadn’t known better, he would have thought her voice wavered slightly
"I’enerally do when they’reout"
She blanched "Don’t leave," she said "If you want to stay--"
"I don’t want to stay I don’t belong here"
"Where will you go?"
"Luke’s," he said, and saw her flinch "For a while After that, I don’t know Maybe to Idris"
"Is that where you think you belong?" There was an aching sadness in her voice
Jace stopped packing for a"I don’t knohere I belong"
"With your family" Maryse took a tentative step forward "With us"
"You threw me out" Jace heard the harshness in his own voice, and tried to soften it "I’ that’s happened But you didn’t wantto be sick awhile; you’ll be needing to take care of him I’ll just be in the way"
"In the way?" She sounded incredulous "Robert wants to see you, Jace--"
"I doubt that"
"What about Alec? Isabelle, Max--they need you If you don’t believe me that I want you here--and I couldn’t blame you if you didn’t--you h a bad time, Jace Don’t hurt them more than they’re already hurt"
"That’s not fair"
"I don’t bla around to stare at her in surprise "But what I did--even throwing you out--treating you as I did, it was to protect you And because I was afraid"
"Afraid of me?"
She nodded
"Well, that makes me feel ht you would break my heart like Valentine did," she said "You were the first thing I loved, you see, after hi creature And you were just a child--"
"You thought I was someone else"
"No I’ve always known just who you are Ever since the first ti off the ship from Idris, when you were ten years old--you walked into my heart, just as my own children did when they were born" She shook her head "You can’t understand You’ve never been a parent You never love anything like you love your children And nothing can ry part," Jace said, after a pause
"I don’t expect you to forgive me," Maryse said "But if you’d stay for Isabelle and Alec and Max, I’d be so grateful--"
It was the wrong thing to say "I don’t want your gratitude," Jace said, and turned back to the duffel bag There was nothing left to put in it He tugged at the zipper
"A la claire fontaine," Maryse said, "m’en allent promener"
He turned to look at her "What?"
"Il y a longtemps que je t’aime Jamais je ne t’oublierai--it’s the old French ballad I used to sing to Alec and Isabelle The one you asked ht in the room now, and in the dimness Maryse looked to him almost as she had when he was ten years old, as if she had not changed at all in the past seven years She looked severe and worried, anxious--and hopeful She looked like the onlythat I never sang it to you," she said "It’s just that you never heard , but he reached out and yanked the zipper open on the duffel bag, letting his belongings spill out onto the bed
EPILOGUE
"CLARY!" SIMON’S MOTHER BEAMED ALL OVER HER FACE AT the sight of the girl standing on her doorstep "I haven’t seen you for ages I was starting to worry you and Siht"
"Oh, no," Clary said "I just wasn’t feeling well, that’s all" Even when you’ve gotrunes, apparently you’re not invulnerable She hadn’t been surprised to wake up theheadache and a fever; she’d thought she had a cold--ouldn’t, after freezing in wet clothes on the open water for hours at night?--but Magnus said she hadthe rune that had destroyed Valentine’s ship
Si Siet out of bed"
"He’s better now, though, right?" Clary said She kneas true, but she didn’t ain
"He’s fine He’s out in the back garden, I think Just go on through the gate" She smiled "He’ll be happy to see you"
The redbrick row houses on Siht iron fences, each of which had a gate that led to a tiny patch of garden in the back of the house The sky was bright blue and the air cool, despite the sunny skies Clary could taste the tang of future snow on the air
She fastened the gate shut behind her and went looking for Si on a plastic lounging chair with a comic open in his lap He pushed it aside when he saw Clary, sat up, and grinned "Hey, baby"
"Baby?" She perched beside hiht?"
"I was trying it out No?"
"No," she said firmly, and leaned over to kiss hiered in her hair, but his eyes were thoughtful
"I’lad you came over," he said
"Me too I would have come sooner, but--"