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We walk back to the truck and cli seeet, I know it’s not Because I’ upand keeps ives ives me hope that maybe this ork out somehow

Chapter 20

One month later…

6 Take a leap of faith

38 Finish Get somewhere with a major project

44 Eat chocolates, have a lot of sex, and enjoy Valentine’s

Day, the day of LOVE!

Kayden

"Ohup tolike a psychopath The library is pretty elasses and fluffy brown hair, scowls at us from behind the counter There are paper hearts all over the shelves and walls and even hanging fro Valentine’s Day is in a few days and I’et Callie, because I want it to be so that will represent her

"Seth" Angling my chin up, I nod "

He’s holding a crinkled paper in his hand I’ve been searching the library for about an hour for a book on Darwinism Usually, I’d use a computer, by Professor Milany is totally old-school and always requires one book reference

"Who gives a shit?" he says and then scrunches his face at the librarian, who tsks, tsks hi to get rid of the creases "I got fantastic fucking news"

I put the book I’d been holding back onto the shelf "No, there’s no way you’ve found him yet… Fuck You have… no…" I’m kind of stuck on words because it’s unbelievable It can’t be possible But the look on his face says otherwise "Shit"

Grinning, he hands me the paper It’s been printed up from the computer and has an article beneath it Above the article is a face that resembles an older version of the brother who left o: dark hair that’s thinned a little, the sareen eyes as etting slammed into a wall I’m stunned beyond words as I stare down at the picture of him

I hadn’t expected this to happen so soon I’d returned fro and told Callie that I think I was ready to start searching My therapist, Jerry, an older guy ears a lot of Hawaiian-print shirts and loafers, suggested itfor Dylan I put up a pretty good argu the fact that I’d slipped up the other night and kind of raot a call fro for him No one knohere they are, why they left, and it’s surprising how little people care My dad’s boss was only looking for hi of his I don’t even kno he gotoutside my Callie-Seth-Luke-school world I messed up, but I told the therapist And Callie And so for Dylan, even though I orried of what he ht not be

"You’ll be fine," he said, chewing on an Altoids, which he always has on hiood to have soh andwith"

"What abandonlad they left"

"Yeah, I know you are," he replied and scratched down some notes on a piece of yellow business paper "But I think you also feel abandoned Even if they’ve done terrible stuff to you, they’re still your family and I think you feel connected to them"

"Or stuck to the back in the lumpy leather chair I always had to sit in

He wrote down so else and then shut the manila folder and shoved it aside with a stack on the corner of his desk

"How about this?" He overlapped his hands on top of his desk

"How about we just try to look for your brother? It doesn’t hurt to try, right?"

I rolledaftershock, so ever since I cut them open "And what if we find him?"

He opened the tin of Altoids on his desk and popped one into hisback in the chair "Well, that’s really up to you"

After sitting in silence for about fifteento the wall clock tick and the traffic rush outside, I’d agreed When I went out to dinner that night with Callie, Seth, and Luke, they decided to take it upon themselves to look for him

I just didn’t expect Seth to find him so quickly

"He kind of looks the sareen eyes, which resemble mine in an eerie, uncomfortable kind of way