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She’s never been good at handling things that don’t fit into her world And rebel-runaway Callie fits about as well as lone-Goth Callie did

"We could get a hotel rooests as we pull into town "And keep the vacation going"

"Or at least avoid going horumpily

It’s late, the trees in the park are flashing with lively red twinkly lights, and there’s a huge inflatable Santa at the entrance welco us to town Kayden has been really quiet the entire drive, staring out the , lost in his thoughts and itthe entire drive and Seth has been equally as bad

I glance at Kayden, wondering what he thinks of the hotel idea, but all he does is stare out the"I feel like if I go to hotel then I’o home and face the wrath of ape at hiarette and sticks his hand out the , scattering ash into the street as he grazes his thumb across the end "Callie, I hate to say this"--his brown eyes flick to Luke, then to Kayden, before he leans in and whispers--"but until you can tell yourup at your house, ityourself"

I press ether as he leans back "I’m don’t torture myself," I arette out theand then rolls it up Luke’s truck is really old and doesn’t have autoainst the tension in the handle

Kayden glances at rees quietly

I think about all the ti I could just shrink into a ball, ether

But if I could have just broken Caleb’s hold over me, maybe I would have escaped fro inside myself Could I do it? Just free o back unless I want to I can go back when I’et a hotel rooet to it

I don’t have to go back home until I’m ready I have choices, power, freedos that hurtif I want to I just have to choose to do it Suddenly, I can breathe freely again I’ at lances at ood"

I offer hi so upset

Everything had been okay e left the beach house, at least I thought so I lean into hi me a puzzled look "Yeah, ouldn’t I be?"

"I don’t know," I say, eyeing the sadness in his eyes "You look sad"

"Well, I’m not I promise" He returns his attention to theandhe’s not telling me But I don’t want to press him in front of Luke and Seth, so I keep quiet

Ten minutes later we’re checked into a motel room with two queen-size beds, a retro décor, and air s about the sleeping arrangement and I take the opportunity to talk to Kayden about what’s bothering hi down on the bed beside hih the television isn’t on "Yeah, I’m fine I already told you that"

"But you’ve been so quiet," I say "You’ve barely said a word since we left California"

"I’htstand and stares out theHe does look really exhausted, but I don’t think that’s the real reason Like he senses entle squeeze "Callie, stop worrying I’et up from the bed to use the restrooe of the bathtub

I don’t really have to use the bathrooe toinside ive into it, because it’s been a while and I’ hThat I can live life without e

It takes me a while, but about ten minutes later, I calm down and walk out of the bathroom, surprised to find Luke on one bed and Seth on the other watching television and Kayden is nowhere to be seen

"Where’d Kayden go?" I ask, walking between the two beds

They both look up at aze around the room Seth sits up with his brows furrowed "Huh?

I didn’t hear hi out of the back of the truck," he tells me "But he’s been out there for a few h me as I round the foot of the bed and draw back the curtain The neon VACANT sign lights up the parking lot where the truck is parked down below, snow falling on the hood and roof I can’t see Kayden anywhere, but I tellup the stairs, which are out ofon my shoes, I run out the door

"Callie, what the hell?" I hear Seth call out as I leave the door wide open I don’t turn back, racing to the botto lot When I reach Luke’s truck, Kayden isn’t there I search the parking lot and even walk over to the lobby, wondering ifwith a thousand thoughts of what’s going on Where would he go? Why would he leave? Why did he look so sad?

By the ti down it I’m about in tears, frozen without a jacket on

"He’s gone," I sputter

They meet me at the bottom of the steps and Luke’s forehead creases as he stares at his truck "What do you one?"