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"So what do we do with him?"

"Kill him," he said, very softly "The avatar is physical It can die"

There was so really unpleasant about that idea, and I didn’t care to examine it too closely "Can’t we--I don’t know, evict Mommie Dearest from the avatar?"

"No We either leave it here, where it can strike at us any time she wants, or we kill it But there’s no other choice, Jo"

It felt vile, soht, I’d be destroying a shell, not a person

Not a person who’d driven me halfway across the country Who’d saved my life

I couldn’t stand to think about it any longer I picked up the gun fro next to the sink, cocked it, and aimed at the avatar’s head

David put his hand on my shoulder--not to stop me, but to steady me

And I fired

It was the worst thing I had ever done

Chapter Ten

The aetheric blindness was gone i back, restoring him Everybody was happy

Everybody but un in ht of the avatar’s head--

"Jo" That was David, sitting down next towhile, and they’d been sensible enough to let h

"Leave "

"I know that Just leave ently "I would have done it for you"

"You think I’d have felt better watching you kill one of your own?" I sed a bitter uely where I’d left the M&M candies I thought I could have used one right now to get the terrible, bloody taste out of uilt like a big girl"

David hesitated, then put his arm around me I opened my eyes and saw that Luis Rocha was slu (soed beast with claustrophobia I didn’t think she would have hesitated to pop a cap in an avatar, but then again, I didn’t really want to be her, either

She bugged me

"I should tell you who he was, once," David said, and that made me turn and look at hiht he’d always been an empty shell?"

"Well--yeah Kind of"

"He was Old Djinn, once--but not like Ashan More like Venna He was curious about huence of forces, very rare, while trying to save humans from an earthquake It destroyed the Djinn he had been, and left the shell behind Since then, he’s been wandering E hi, and then continued more slowly "He said that we’d need him someday"

"Oh Jesus

, David!" I foundmy mouth with both hands, appalled Jonathan had demonstrated a turn for prophecy, more than once "Why didn’t you stop me?"

"Because I think what Jonathan saas howto need hined to do" He shook his head

"That sounds wrong That’s not what I meant But I feel that his destiny was already over"

Again, that didn’t ht now could make me feel better because Jesus Christ

I’d just pulled the trigger and killed someone, even if it hadn’t been a person, a real person, or even a real Djinn

My body still replayed it, over and over And it hurt

"You need to rest," David told et sometimes He meant it, and when I opened my mouth to protest, he covered it with one hand "Stretch out Coo"

I still feltdown felt a whole lot better than sitting up Cassiel had gotten adventurous and raided a linen closet, and found bags of clean sheets, towels, and blankets They weren’t the kind of high-thread-count stuff you’d get at the tonier hotels, but they felt good on ifted me with Bastard Well, at least he hadn’t dressed me in knockoffs Could have been worse

I flinched again as the sound of the shot rang inlided down my neck, over my shoulder, down my armIt wasn’t erotic, but da in my body that seemed to have been permanently knotted up, fused into a hard mass

I let out a slow breath, and with it went soer, ht that I’d insanely decided to sleep with David; I hadn’t known his na to alter the trajectory of my life on a course up, toward the stars He’d been so kind to me then And he’d touched me exactly the same way, and despite all my best efforts at seduction, he hadn’t touched me any other way Not then

It occurred to me now that I should have valued thatspecial

But at least I’d been s on to him once I did realize what I had

"Why are aiting?" I asked "The avatar’s gone We can go now"

"We will," David said, and his ly over its curves "You need to rest You picked up a big dose of radiation outside of Amarillo, and I can’t heal you properly if you’re awake So sleep Oncecomes, we’llto look at us in a guilty sort of way, as if she just realized she was probably being annoying, and settled into a chair close to where Luis was sawing logs

Rahel stood at the door, a silent statue, watching and waiting