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He was done

I knew it deep down in my heart

Don’t run

I’m not

It seemed like forever before he replied: You should

I debated calling in sick after that, but I didn’t

I couldn’t

I had been down that road too many times

I knew I could so easily fall back into old self- destructive habits to dull pain

It would kill me to lose Gideon, but I’d be dead anyway if I lost h

Get by

One step at a time

And so I climbed into the back of the Bentley when I was supposed to, and while Angus’s grim face only made me worry more, I locked it down and slid into the autopilot h the hours ahead

My day passed in a blur

I worked hard and focused oncrazy, butan errand, unable to tolerate the thought of eating ors to ave a siiven toin a direction I couldn’t bear to go

"Better," Parker said, during a break

"You’re still off, but you’re better than last night"

I nodded and wiped the sweat from my face with a towel

I’d started Parker’s classes solely as a ht had shown me that personal safety was more than just a convenient side benefit

The tribal tattoos that banded his biceps flexed as he lifted a water bottle to his lips

Because he was left-handed, his siht and ht hand and I looked down at it

I reiven it toaround the roped gold were representative of hiht that way; if he still thought it orth it to try

God knew I did

"Ready?" Parker asked, tossing his erinned

"There she is"

Parker still workedonood, healthy exercise

The few victories I ht forto put in the time and effort to be there for Gideon, to be a better and stronger person so we could get through our issues

And I was going to tell him that, whether he wanted to hear it or not

When ood-bye to my classmates and then shoved at the push bar of the exit door and stepped out into the still-warht the car around to the door and was leaning against the fender in a pose that only a moron would think was casual

Despite the heat, he wore a jacket, which concealed his sidearhtened to open the door foras I’d known him, he’d kept his dark blond hair in aa very so into the backseat, I told Clancy to drop me off at Gideon’s

I had my own key and I was prepared to use it

On the drive over, I wondered if Gideon had gone to see Dr

Petersen for his appointreed to individual therapy only because of ht not see any reason to ant lobby of Gideon’s apart and checked in with the front desk

It wasn’t until I was alone in his private elevator that the nerves really hit me

He’d placed esture that meant so much more to him and me than it would to others because Gideon’s home was his sanctuary, a place he allowed few visitors to see

I was the only lover he’d ever entertained there and the only person, aside from his household staff, who had a key

Yesterday I wouldn’t have doubted my welcome, but now

I exited into a small foyer decorated with checkerboard ement of white calla lilies

Before I unlocked his front door, I took a deep breath, steeling ht find him

The one previous time he’d attacked me in his sleep, it had shattered him

I couldn’t help but fear what the second tiht be the wedge that drove us apart

But the moment I entered his aparty that thruh a space when he occupied it was hts that were activated byrooed there

My roo on the threshold to absorb the weirdness of seeing my bedroom replicated in Gideon’s place

The duplication was uncanny, from the color on the walls to the furniture and fabrics, but its existence was

Gideon had created it as my safe room, a place for me to run to when I needed so to it now, in a way, by using it instead of his

Setting ed into one of the Cross Industries T- shirts Gideon had set aside for me

I tried not to think about why he still wasn’t holass of wine and turned on the living roo

"Hello?" I answered, unfamiliar with the number on the nameless Caller ID

"Eva? It’s Shawna"