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"Sang is ould happen if led but quickly turned serious We were short on tiolden s before Crio back if you could?" I asked him

He seemed surprised by the question, as if he actually hadn’t considered it "That would depend on what I had to go back for," he said, studying his hands "I wouldn’t want to be paralyzed or anything It doesn’t really matter orld I’m in if I can’t play the piano There’d be no point to life withoutcould be the way it was before the accident Or better"

"And what if you had to stay here?" I pressed

He didn’t knoon the conversation, but I only had a few minutes to solve est decisions of my life

"I like it here, I do," he said "There are different rules I’ a family, people to care about, and I think I could have that, if everything worked out the way I’d like it to" Another s soht place"

"So would you rather stay with the caravan or live in the city?" I asked

"The caravan is fine for me, but the only safe place for women and children is in the city," he said "And so the first piano bar" He chuckled "I’ve always loved to travel I’ll find a keyboard wherever I go, but there’s no point in being pinned down unless there’s so me down Someone like you"

"Casper, I--"

"You know that’s not the na in his voice drew me in I leaned closer Our eyes entle jolt, soft as waking up in a sunbea up I saw us in his town ho a pot of coffee and the newspaper, sprawled on the couch with"Happy Birthday" on the piano, singing toa cake gliently swollen belly I saw his cousin’s room painted over blue, a nursery, and a tiny, serious boy with brown hair sitting in his father’s lap with a toy keyboard and a stuffed rabbit I sawbefore a store , one wrinkled hand pressed to the glass Inside the store, a gold and ruby locket glinted, and tears of remorse streaked down my withered face

"What’s the matter?" he asked softly

I realized that my cheeks et, and I shook my head I couldn’t tell him And that was part of the problem But I had one more question "So what do you think I should do?" I asked finally "Assu I have a choice?"

He didn’t even have to think about it "Stay here withone of rimy neck of my shirt with my free hand

"We can move to London It’s the most metropolitan city, and the safest The closest to our world I’ll playor be a clerk somewhere We’ll save up some money and open a dinner theater It’s the American dream, just in an entirely different world We can invent show tunes and pizza They won’t knohat hit them"

I looked at our hands on the table, his wrapped possessively around iddy because he sucked all of the oxygen away He’d alreadyme into the puzzle I wasn’t ready to be held captive like that again, even if there was happiness in the bargain

My glance had been seductive in ed for all ht I wanted Warh it broke my heart to know that I would neverthat struck me to the bone was the look on , the wondering what I had given up That version of me understood as lost, and she was broken

And I knew my answer

I slid my hand away and dropped it to my lap I looked back into his eyes, which were beautiful and hopeful and so full of plans I hated to disappoint him

"I’m sorry," I said "But I can’t do that"