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Chapter One

Ethan

"Hey, can you pass ?" I ask my six-year-old niece, Tallie, as we sit at the breakfast bar in her parents’ house, surrounded by the scent of fresh-baked cookies and the last remnants of the cupcakes that we’ve already decorated for tomorrow’s party

She hands ue between my teeth as I start to draw out a little heart on the round cookie in front of me She watches, her head tipped to the side just the same way her ing me

My sister thinks it’s tiht woman yet? It’s hard to find the kind of woman I crave when I’m always on a movie set The ones Itype And call ht stand won’t do I want forever

"What do you think?" I ask Tallie, lifting the sugar cookie up so she can see what I’ve atte nearly all slides right off I laugh, shake my head, and hand the cookie over to her

"Let ently I nod, and watch as she starts to get down to work, her eyes screwed up as she carefully traces out the shape on the cookie in front of her

Valerie and her husband, Don, are out of town till Saturday , which is also Valentine’s Day It's Thursday now – and I’ve been enlisted to help out so they can sneak away for a few nights as an early Valentine’s gift to themselves

Not that I mind Truth is I’m jealous They are the epitoet my hands on that kind of love

And since I have a break between shoots, the ti out with irl in the world

She always asks to see theher that when she’s older, she h I doubt that herher watch the stuff that I’ in; I know that Val herself so that people actually want to watchto expose her daughter to the sa

When I’h, when I’ that lad that I’ve found soood at – but these nights with s in the world

"So, do you have a date for the party?" I ask her playfully We are preparing snacks for the little Valentine’s Day thing that her first-grade class is throwing to to be more focused on the cookies and cupcakes than the hearts and flowers She pulls a face

"No!" she exclaio to a party with any boy!"

I laugh It’s strange to think that, in ten years or so, she’s going to be pleading with her et her hands on That’s what it’s like, growing up, I guess

Or what it’s like for most people As Tallie and I clean up, and I put her to bed, I can’t help but wonder how long it’s going to be before I get to experience so like this for myself It’s not that I’m unhappy withinside of ent and forceful, that tellslike this A family A partner So day Someone I can take care of

I check that Tallie is asleep before I retreat to the guest roo I’m happy for my sister, I really am; I know that this is what she’s alanted, that she has never craved the enormity of my life

As I lie in bed, I stare at the ceiling, thinking about the frosted pink heart-shaped cookies in their Tupperware boxes, ready for Tallie to take to school toifts to I wish that I did

But I know that everyone Iat aot cast in the Mandolin series, I’ve been dealing with the stress of having to second-guess everyone who coet it, I do – with fame and power and money comes people ant to take a little part of that for thealone at night when I wish I could be spending it with someone else