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"I would not," Grenn said "I’m no oathbreaker I said the words and I meant them"
"So did I," Jon told them "Don’t you understand? Theyin the riverlands--"
"We know," said Pyp sole"
"We’re sorry about your father," Grenn said, "but it doesn’t matter Once you say the words, you can’t leave, no matter what"
"I have to," Jon said fervently
"You said the words," Pyp reins, you said it It shall not end until my death"
"I shall live and die at
"You don’t have to tell ry now Why couldn’t they let hi it harder
"I am the sword in the darkness," Halder intoned
"The watcher on the walls," piped Toad
Jon cursed them all to their faces They took no notice Pyp spurred his horse closer, reciting, "I as the dawn, the horn that wakes the sleepers, the shield that guards the realms ofhis sword "Iarmor, he could cut them to pieces if he had to
Matthar had circled behind hie ht’s Watch"
Jon kicked hisher in a circle The boys were all around hiht" Halder trotted in frohts to come," finished Pyp He reached over for Jon’s reins "So here are your choices Kill me, or come back with me"
Jon lifted his swordand lowered it, helpless "Damn you," he said "Damn you all"
"Do we have to bind your hands, or will you give us your word you’ll ride back peaceful?" asked Halder
"I won’t run, if that’s what you lared at him "Small help you were," he said The deep red eyes looked at hily
"We had best hurry," Pyp said "If we’re not back before first light, the Old Bear will have all our heads"
Of the ride back, Jon Snow remembered little It seemed shorter than the journey south, perhaps because his , trotting, and then breaking into another gallop Mole’s Town cauished They liainst the pale immensity of the Wall It did not seem like home this time
They could take him back, Jon told himself, but they could not make him stay The ould not end on the morrow, or the day after, and his friends could not watch hiht He would bide his time, make them think he was content to rerown lax, he would be off again Next tisroad He could follow the Wall east, perhaps all the way to the sea, a longer route but a safer one Or even west, to the h passes That was the wildling’s way, hard and perilous, but at least no one wouid follow hiues of Winterfell or the kingsroad
Saround against a bale of hay, too anxious to sleep He rose and brushed hilad they found you, Jon"
"I’
Pyp hopped off his horse and looked at the lightening sky with disgust "Give us a hand bedding down the horses, Sa day before us, and no sleep to face it on, thanks to Lord Snow"
When day broke, Jon walked to the kitchens as he did every dawn Three-Finger Hobb said nothing as he gave his boiled hard, with fried bread and ham steak and a bowl of wrinkled plu’s Tower He found Mor back and forth across his shoulders, , "Corn, corn, corn" The bird shrieked when Jon entered "Put the food on the table," the Old Bear said, glancing up "I’ll have some beer"
Jon opened a shuttered , took the flagon of beer off the outside ledge, and filled a horn Hobb had given him a lemon, still cold from the Wall Jon crushed it in his fist The juice trickled through his fingers Mormont drank lemon in his beer every day, and claimed that hy he still had his own teeth
"Doubtless you loved your father," Mors we love destroy us every time, lad Remember when I told you that?"
"I remember," Jon said sullenly He did not care to talk of his father’s death, not even to Moret it The hard truths are the ones to hold tight Fetch ain? So be it You look weary Was your ?"
Jon’s throat was dry "You know?"
"Know," the raven echoed from Mormont’s shoulder "Know"
The Old Bear snorted "Do you think they chose ht’s Watch because I’o I told him you’d be back I know sroadand honor brought you back"
"My friends brought me back," Jon said
"Did I say it was your honor?" Mormont inspected his plate
"They killed ?"
"If truth be told, we expected you to do just as you did" Mormont tried a plum, spit out the pit "I ordered a watch kept over you, You were seen leaving If your brothers had not fetched you back, you would have been taken along the way, and not by friends Unless you have a horse ings like a raven Do you?"
"No" Jon felt like a fool
"Pity, we could use a horse like that"
Jon stood tall He told himself that he would die well; that much he could do, at the least "I know the penalty for desertion, my lord I’m not afraid to die"
"Die!" the raven cried
"Nor live, I hope," Mor a bite to the bird "You have not deserted--yet Here you stand If we beheaded every boy who rode to Mole’s Town in the night, only ghosts would guard the Wall Yet ht from now Is that it? Is that your hope, boy?"
Jon kept silent
"I thought so" Mor "Your father is dead, lad Do you think you can bring him back?"
"No," he answered, sullen
"Good," Mormont said "We’ve seen the dead co I care to see again" He ate the egg in two bites and flicked a bit of shell out from between his teeth "Your brother is in the field with all the power of the north behind him Any one of his lords bannerht’s Watch Why do you ihty warrior, or do you carry a gruic up your sword?"
Jon had no answer for hi the shell Pushing his beak through the hole, he pulled out hed "You are not the only one touched by this war Like as not,in your brother’s host, her and those daughters of hers, dressed in e is a hoary old snark, stubborn, short-tempered, and willful Truth be told, I can hardly stand to be around the wretched woman, but that does not mean my love for her is any less than the love you bear your half sisters" Frowning, Mor and squeezed it in his fist until the shell crunched "Or perhaps it does Be that as it rieve if she were slain, yet you don’t seeoff I said the words, just as you did My place is herewhere is yours, boy?"
I have no place, Jon wanted to say, I’hts, no name, no mother, and now not even a father The words would not come "I don’t know"
"I do," said Lord Co, Snow Beyond the Wall, the shadows lengthen Cotter Pyke writes of vast herds of elk, strea south and east toward the sea, and e, ers froes abandoned, and at night Ser Denys says they see fires in the e blazes that burn from dusk till dawn Quorin Halfhand took a captive in the depths of the Gorge, and theall his people in soods only know Do you think your uncle Benjen was the only ranger we’ve lost this past year?"
"Ben Jen," the raven squawked, bobbing its head, bits of egg dribbling from its beak "Ben Jen Ben Jen"
"No," Jon said There had been others Too many
"Do you think your brother’s war is more important than ours?" the old man barked
Jon chewed his lip The raven flapped its wings at hi
"It’s not," Mormont told him "Gods save us, boy, you’re not blind and you’re not stupid When dead ht, do you think it matters who sits the Iron Throne?"
"No" Jon had not thought of it that way
"Your lord father sent you to us, Jon Why, who can say?"
"Why? Why? Why?" the raven called
"All I know is that the blood of the First Men flows in the veins of the Starks The First Men built the Wall, and it’s said they reotten And that beast of yourshe led us to the wights, warned you of the dead man on the steps Ser Jaremy would doubtless call that happenstance, yet Ser Jaremy is dead and I’m not" Lord Morer "I think you were meant to be here, and I want you and that wolf of yours with us e go beyond the Wall"
His words sent a chill of excitement down Jon’s back "Beyond the Wall?"
"You heard me I mean to find Ben Stark, alive or dead" He chewed and sed "I will not sit here meekly and wait for the snows and the ice winds We ht’s Watch will ride in force, against the King-beyond-the-Wall, the Others, and anything else that may be out there I er at Jon’s chest "By custom, the Lord Commander’s steward is his squire as wellbut I do not care to wake every daondering if you’ve run off again So I will have an answer from you, Lord Snow, and I will have it now Are you a brother of the Night’s Watchor only a bastard boy ants to play at war?"
Jon Snow straightened hiive ive me, I cannot help you He has the truth of it This is my place "I amyours, ain"
The Old Bear snorted "Good Now go put on your sword"